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Karmic Swamp Ass

noun - a vaporous secretion from a described heinous anus that in return punishes its sender.
Colt released karmic swamp ass upon himself.
by The Real Ass Kite June 7, 2024
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Karmic fuckery

When you do everything right and as you're expected/supposed to, and the universe fucks you anyway.

Instead of karma giving you what you earned/deserve (good or bad), you get the opposite.

Unfair turn of events.
I always carry poop bags to pick up after my dog on all walks and have even knocked on someone's door to get a bag for clean up rather than just walk away (cuz whose going to say "no, just leave the poop on my lawn), but I end up stepping in random dog poop carelessly left by others. What in the karmic fuckery is up with that? That is some messed up karmic fuckery.
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karmacinoma

A cancer of the soul caused by a douchebag insane enough to spread bullshit news of illness and death about their loves ones; in order to pathetically evoke the sympathy of others.
Hey man, did you hear Jenkins has Karmacinoma, his dead sister came back to life.
by Tambell September 17, 2018
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Karmila

Karmila.
Compassion, understanding and an overall positive outlook at life and all the obstacles it brings is just one ability a Karmila is a able to bring to you if you are ever lucky enough to meet her.

Just her very presence brings enlightenment to ones self allowing them the ability to grow and process their own mental maps of the world as she always provides a conscious safe environment for anyone to express purity in their representations of the here and now in which we all call reality. They like to be social/resourceful/helpful and will always go out of their way to make others lives easier, especially if it will strengthen the bond of a good friendship. However she can often delve into the interest of others issues and personal drama, making her tractable as she can have a sense of others emotions which she tends to absorb as her own.Karmila will laugh with you and cry with you but most of all she will always be there for you, a stride for guidance and optimism resembles her heartfelt maternal nature.
However a Karmila can be over sympathetic attracting people who can naturally take advantage of her unique understanding and ability to share good advice.
K is for kid, the child within.
A is for able, for she surely is.
R is for reassuring, eliminating doubts!
M is for musical, her hidden talent!
I is for intellect, her high capacity for knowledge
L is for luster, her shine.
A is for agreeable, the best side of her.
Karmila, holistically eternal.
by Karmila October 23, 2020
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karmaclismic

When karma hits back like a muthafucka, and the whole house of cards that is your life comes crumbling down.
Due to an onrush of karmaclismic events, Howie's life fell apart around him. Maybe he shouldn't have always badmouthed handicapped people.
by Haggymania October 15, 2011
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kardick

While mistaken with a car's dick, Kardick is basically a Kartik who has the fattest dick you've ever seen. The dick is so fat that it's the size of a car.
Her: Kartik isn't Kartik, he's Kardick
Friend: why?
Her: He parked his car sized dick in me and made me his garage
by randohobo October 20, 2020
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Karmacinoma

A case of cancer bestowed upon a person, by the universe, in retribution for being an asshole. The severity, prognosis, and degree of suffering endured by the deserving victim are in direct proportion to the scale and egregiousness of the victim's history of being an asshole. The majority of cases are not terminal, suggesting that universe intends these cases to be painful and expensive wake-up calls for the affected assholes. In terminal cases of Karmacinoma, it appears that the universe is unleashing its oncogenic wrath as a means of purging the most flagrant assholes from society.

Upon contracting Karmacinoma, no acts of contrition, apologies, or promises to modify behavior have been shown to mitigate the severity or duration of the disease. In cases where the victim survives the illness, such acts and sustained follow-though on them have been shown to extend remission, often indefinitely. Recurrent cases of Karmacinoma carry a 100% terminal prognosis, a clear indication that the universe does not appreciate disregard of a clear and intended wake-up call.

Research has concluded that there is some minimum threshold of being an asshole that must be exceeded before the universe metes out its malignant vengeance on a target victim, suggesting that the universe tolerates some level of asshole behavior. This finding is supported by the empirical observation that every single person is an asshole occasionally, yet not everyone has cancer.
Halpert: Hey, Pam, I just heard that Michael Scott was diagnosed with cancer.
Beesly: Yea, it's bad, Jim. They're saying it's terminal.
Halpert: Any word on what kind of cancer?
Beesly: Stage 4 Karmacinoma.
Halpert: It figures. That guy was such a major asshole.
by Clark F. Kent December 6, 2019
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