Skip to main content

I don't need it... but I need it.

An item that you absolutely do not need to buy however you have to have it. I don't need it... but I need it.
As she passed by the store window and leather boots caught the corner of her eye she thought to herself I don't need it... but I need it.
by msscream1234 February 6, 2018
mugGet the I don't need it... but I need it. mug.

I need to sort out my life

Every assholes go-to excuse for ignoring you so they could play games and talk to other people.
You: Hey, I really miss talking to you!
*five hours later*
You: Oh... I guess you don’t feel the same way.
Them: Sorry, I need to sort out my life.
by Getrekt911 June 18, 2019
mugGet the I need to sort out my life mug.

Help, I need help

You say this phrase when you are genually stressed and in danger because your shoe lace has become undone. It is best to scream it so people can be alarmed and tie it for you.
"Help, I need help"
"What is it?"
"My shoe lace has come undone"
The person then reties it for you
by WiseWordsFromCP December 21, 2017
mugGet the Help, I need help mug.

I need to pee

basically can I use the bathroom/ where is the bathroom
by Wiggly Mr.Dickls the 1st October 8, 2019
mugGet the I need to pee mug.

I need a calculator

An office phrase roughly translated to "I need a bailout or rescue." Something awful is happening to the person who has given you this message, and it's your responsibility to bail them out. Situations in which this phrase is appropriate:

- An office camper has left the original intended topic for some light-hearted small talk about his child you hate
- An office camper with horrid breath has pinned you
- You're in a meeting that's so boring you will have to snort coke off a stripper's chesticles to balance your life back in the right direction

The message generally arrives in the form of text or instant message. When the situation is dire, email may be used. The appropriate response is generally to come up with technical nonsense to ask this person then either call or visit to bail them out.
Office Camper: "Enough about linux, did you know my child is an honor's student? She's taking all AP classes in the Spring. God we're so proud of her ... "
Jim (Victim) text messages Vince (Savior) "I need a calculator" to avoid nosy eyes understanding this dire message.
Office Camper: "She even taught some of the other children in the class how to use it! Can you believe that? Even the teacher was impressed"
Savior: "Hey Jim! Listen I need some help with linux..."
Office Camper: "Oh well I can see you're busy"
by Fatty Tatterson September 10, 2009
mugGet the I need a calculator mug.

I need you

When you can't live without someone and you wish they would feel the same way you do .
Her: I need you.
Him: I don't need you.
by Jessica is greeeeeat ! (: October 13, 2009
mugGet the I need you mug.

I Need A Rap

A phrase used by people that hate Chav Music. It means I need a shit. The main few phrases used to mean the same thing are I need a rap, I need a rave. I need a gangsta rap, I need an R&B, I need a clubland, I need a hip-hop, and I need a pop. They originate from the phrase I need a Chav Music.
Dad: Shall we go to ADSA then Flonkule to see Daniel the Spacker?

Flonkule: Yeah one sec, I need a rap.
mugGet the I Need A Rap mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email