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furniture socialism

When you buy a chair you move it in the house. However if you want it as your private property you have to move it in your room. If you want it in the living room you have to let everybody sit in it and you have no say.
Screw furniture socialism I paid for my damn chair and no one is going to sit in it!
by Critikale May 18, 2018
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furniture brother

When you and another man have both had sex on the same specific piece of furniture (couch, bed, dresser, pool table, etc.)
If you and another woman have both had sex on the same specific piece of furniture but not with each other, then you are furniture sisters.
John had sex with his girlfriend in my bed last night. Guess we're furniture brothers now!
by Dan Matison August 20, 2013
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Furniture Freestyle

The extreme action sport involving riding office chairs, desks, coffee tables, pianos and any other items of furniture. Generally the rider wears protective clothing used in sports like freestyle motocross or bmx and the furniture is ridden down hills, rails and off drops or even ramps. Invented by Maverick Gunner and Rory Williams, displayed in the Youtube video: Furniture Freestyle, an athlete's perspective.
"Man, what's another action sport I can do now that I quit fmx?"
"Well if your hardcore enough you could take up Furniture Freestyle."
"Ah yes, that's a real man's sport!"
by Maverick Gunner October 30, 2010
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Furniture store

The only retail establishment that starts out in bankruptcy. Within 30 days of opening, there will be a teenager standing roadside in front of the furniture store holding a sign that states they are having a “going out of business sale” and all furniture must go, prices up to 70% off.
Hey Jim, I’m heading out to look at leather couches at that new furniture store on Route 1. Is that kid out front yet holding the going out of business sale, or has it not been 30 days yet?
by Grant Rampus November 11, 2019
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Furniture Zombie

When a customer comes into a furniture store multiple times throughout the week and walks around looking at the same things without asking any questions or for help; in a zombie like manner. Furniture Zombies also never buy and waste your time. This is similar to a Furniture Vampire but a Furniture Zombie doesn’t speak or acknowledge that a sales person is even there. A Furniture Zombie episode could last 20 seconds to 2 hours. The typical age of a Furniture Zombie is the ages 70 and up. At least 1 out of 10 customers is considered a Furniture Zombie. If a Furniture Zombie is under the age of 70 then you have a rare form of Furniture Zombie which might be better or worse than a typical Furniture Zombie.
Susan had a classic Furniture Zombie. The woman was 80 years old and she was previously in the past two days looking at all of the furniture pieces on the floor. Susan asked her if she could help but the woman didn't respond and looked like a zombie.
by TheFurnitureGal April 26, 2011
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Furniture funk

The lent, dust, crumbs, spare change and other unidentifiable stuff that is found between and under the cushions of lounge chairs and sofas.
We have got to do a better job of cleaning the house. I reached down between the sofa cushions yesterday and pulled out all of this furniture funk, it was disgusting. sofa stank, chair cheese, lent crumbs, furniture dust, dust devils
by joecoolthefool December 21, 2014
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Furniture Disease

When a woman's breasts sag to their waist and/or further. They usually become smaller and wrinkly from beinging out of their original position.
Whoa! Your grandma's saggy tits really shows that she has a nasty case of furniture disease.
by Applesaucelord December 15, 2004
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