flatlander

A term used to describe the suburban-Chicago folk. These over consumers have earned their nickname by flooding near by states such as Wisconsin and Michigan to exploit as vacation spots. Residents of the victimized states witness complete retardation during the months of June, July, and August when the flatlanders retreat from the tickey tack of the daily routine to their "lake house" or "cabin" usually located in northern Wisconsin or Western Michigan. A good weekend at the "lake house" for a flatlander consists of a failed fishing attempt, a boating accident, numerous trips to the nearest subway, at least 8 hours spent looking for cell phone service, a failed camping attempt, and a speeding ticket....All while managing to leave most of their trash on the beach or at the bottom of the lake. States such as Iowa and Indiana also hold a deep hatred for fagot flatlanders. Due to a lack of a sufficient public education system, and the over popularization of Suburban Chicago, neighboring public universities such as University of Iowa and Indiana University are flooded with flatlander scum. A flatlander generally lacks any sort of style, flavor, uniqueness, hobby, or anything that is not "in the now" or accepted by the mass. Many scholars believe that the Pink Floyd anthem "another brick in the wall" is a direct reference to the lack of uniqueness and purpose the flatlander offers. "All and all were just a another brick in the wall".

Jim:Hey Dale you wanna go musky fishing in Mercer this weekend?

Dale:Hell no, its July, those fuckin Flatlanders will be breaking their boats and shit...I'm sure we would have to tow atleast 4 or 5 of them into shore and wouldnt get to fish at all.

Jim:Yeah the lake will probably be full of littered trash and bull too.

Dale:Fuck those fags and their gas guzzling suburbans and escalades.

Jim: You wanna just throw in some long cut and drowned some PBR's instead.

Dale: Yes

by sconnnnnie March 1, 2010

flatlander

where i'm from, a flatlander is the worst thing to be. its kind of like in california where the locals hate the tourists that come to surf, well in northern PA we hate people from jersey, pittsburgh, and philadelphia that come up to hunt deer. a flatlander usually, though not always, has zero respect for the land, the animals they're trying to hunt, and the locals that put up with them. some of them are nice guys that have a true love for hunting, but the majority of them come up to get drunk at the hunting camp, get into fights at the bar, and for the most part make people from northern PA wary of anything that has a funny accent.

TRUE STORY. A flatlander comes up to me after a day of hunting, he was in a field that was frequented by cows. ME:did you see anything ?
FLATLANDER: no but there are sure some big deer up here. the tracks are huge!!
ME: those are tracks left by cows.

by flatlandersareruiningoursport November 12, 2008

flatlander

A person from a lower elevation in the state of Pennsylvania who delights in visiting (or worse - moving to) higher elevations and ruining the culture, typically in the northcentral part of the state.

Flatlanders think that they can move to the hills, have babies, and the babies are therefore not flatlanders. If a cat crawls into your oven and has a litter, are the offspring cookies?

Go back to Philadelphia, you fucking flatlander.

by Gladnottobeone April 1, 2004

flatlander

flatlander is a species of people who live in flatland. Talked about by Edwin Abbott Abbott in his book "flatland". It is a thought experiment about 2 dimensional beings, and their perceptions. A intro to the math subject topography.

A Square is a flatlander, he discovered lineland, and was once visited by A sphere, and was baffled by the 3rd dimension.

by clayton bigsby the fourth November 6, 2017

Flatardia

Places Flatards congregate, IE. Flat earth groups on social media, Flat earth conferences, Mom's basement.

see flatard

That post is strait out of Flatardia.

by Nathan Tampoon May 15, 2018

flatlander

a person who is so unaware of their surroundings they cannot even function in the world. These people are jokes in life and have no sense of style, coolness or anything of the sort.

Joe: Hey man do u wanna come over and read or something.

Kyle: Bro, are you kidding me, ur a complete flatlander

by tenth dimension March 22, 2009

flatlander

A term used by hicks in Vermont, Maine and New Hampshire to describe people who come from other states; usually a negative connotation used by hicks because they are envious that people from others states know how to make money and can't realize that you won't make cash worth a barrel of shit on a farm or a gas station out in the woods.

Flatlanders know how to live. Get a life, you damn hicks.

by idonthavaname September 23, 2006