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erectile performance

{n.} The degree to which a male possesses the capacity for raising a flaccid, favorite organ to an upright or distended positon (e.g., a man's "sleeping" penis or -- as is the case with a male sage grouse or frigatebird -- an uninflated gular sac).
EXAMPLE:

' A unique physical feature of male great frigate birds was also bound to attract the attention of immature human males concerned with erectile performances of their own sex organs. Each male great frigate bird at mating time tried to attract the attention of females by inflating a bright red balloon at the base of his throat. At mating time, a typical rookery when viewed from the air resembled an enormous party for human children, at which every child had received a red balloon. The {Galápagos} island would in fact be paved with male great frigate birds with their heads tilted back, their qualifications as husbands inflated by their lungs to the bursting point—while, overhead, the females wheeled.

' One by one the females would drop from the sky, having chosen this or that red balloon.

" After Mary Hepburn showed her film about the great frigate birds, some student, . . . almost invariably a male, was sure to ask, sometimes clinically, sometimes as a comedian, sometimes bitterly, hating and fearing women: "Do the females always try to pick the biggest ones?"

' So Mary was ready with a reply: "To answer that, we would have to interview female great frigate birds, and no one has done that yet, so far as I know. Some people have devoted their lives to studying them, though, and it is their opinion that the females are in fact choosing the red balloons which mark the best nesting sites. " '

-- From Kurt Vonnegut's 1985 novel "Galápagos" -- Ch. 20 (p. 114).
by Dinkum August 25, 2013
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erectile vomit

When a mans penis shoots a load of semen onto someone elses face unexpectedly or earlier than anticipated.
Oh wow, i wasnt expecting my face to be covered in Panda's erectile vomit!
by missSMP/PFK October 23, 2017
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Erectile Hyperactivity

A condition where a male body has little to no control over their erectile operation and has very sensitive penile activities with reoccurring erections
OMG he had erectile hyperactivity in the middle of the math's class.
by JymNotGym January 13, 2023
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Erectile Disfunction

by dirty old man April 26, 2005
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Erectile melt down

When you ejaculate and you can't stop it just keeps gushing out even when you are not erect.
Susan I think I'm having an erectile melt down what should we do?
by T-rent October 10, 2014
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Erectile Dysfunction

I wanted a mug that puts my condition on full display for everybody to see
by Spook404 January 30, 2020
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erectile disfuction

one usually a men who has difficulty obtainng erection who needs to use a medication such as viagra or cialis
DYlkan Field.... has trouble gettin a boner therefore he has an erectile disfuction unlike his friend philson who has no problem getting one!
by pilldyl July 24, 2006
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