milking my creature

The art of mindlessly masturbating when you could be doing something more productive.

Did you see the big game last night?
No, I was at home milking my creature.

by RAAAGHderekRAAAGH December 01, 2023

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A Lift Full of Milk

A mouth entirely filled with baby gravy.

We’d gone to the bogs between the main course and pudding arriving, and I’d filled her gob to the brim with love custard. Unfortunately the down button didn’t work, so she had a lift full of milk, and when the doors opened the carpet got drenched. Had to sit there with a flood of jizz on her top for the rest of the meal. I ordered a cheeseboard and some coffees, too.

by Pete’s A December 09, 2023

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Milk Lottery

A miraculous event where 10 to 20 guys each wear and "use" the same condom with the same girl. With their cum combined, the condom is nearly ready for its most vital task. The last guy to use the condom presses the back end against the girl's torn up coochie. And then, the condom gets pushed in; inverting inside her. Leaving it to be anyone's guess who the daddy's gonna be.

Maury: "So who do you think the father is?

Misfortune Mother: "I dunno. Could be any of these 20 guys."

Maury: "How is this possible?!"

Misfortune Mother: "Maury, I got caught up in the Milk Lottery. You don't even know."

by JayWalkin April 20, 2025

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