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Jesus

Born a virgin birth because that's what Mary said. N**** came out with a phd. Wanted to rule the world. Enough said, they still do that in modern day. He did properly exist though.
Oh Jesus no s***Oh Jesus no s***
by Intheflatfield December 24, 2023
mugGet the Jesusmug.

Jesus

A word that sounds like "gee, sus"
AMONG US!

Jesus...
by Moonlight butter May 6, 2025
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Jesus Sperm Theory

We are in a universe sized sperm cell from Jesus and it's going normal sperm speed but we are so small it feels like forever
"Jesus Sperm Theory saved my life man"- Jeffrey Epstein
by Saddam Huissain June 18, 2023
mugGet the Jesus Sperm Theorymug.

Jesus christ

Someone who is alive and almighty who forgives you for your sins someone who is very reliable . The person to look past your past and show true love .
I was at at church and pastor said that Jesus Christ is the one who died for our sins . And arouse again 3 days later, that doesn't make since . U can't die and rise again you are a zombie .. No actually if you read your bible you'll actually see that he was destined before time to do this . So much that satin put in the kings head during that time to kill all the first borns. Jesus destiny still lived on bc god may the way for Mary and Joseph to hide and be protected . Before he died they beat him so much bc they thought he was a joke saying he's the son of god. All the blood is an an expression of forgiveness for your sins that Jesus takes the punishment for. They also made him carry the cross that he died on to say in the walk with christ you'll will have to pick up your own cross and keep walking . It's only for the strong ones who can't take a beating and keep stepping forward. Not really picking up a cross just pick up your emotional burden or physical burden and keep moving.
by RomansEmpirekilledjesus March 23, 2023
mugGet the Jesus christmug.

Jesus Lansus

A term that describes, when your really surprised, confused, mad or rattled?
Bernie: Hey Pev, guess what... Skelator is in front of the house!

Pev: Oh my Jesus Lansus
by Darson Bishop May 3, 2011
mugGet the Jesus Lansusmug.

3 pointer jesus

someone who knows their Jesus even when they ballin on the court
man look at him being a 3 pointer jesus!
by AyyyePappi101 August 3, 2017
mugGet the 3 pointer jesusmug.

jesus

person1: i believe in jesus
mugGet the jesusmug.

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