Pretzel

Pretzel-n.- A woman or man that is small in stature and overall body mass, with the naturally reoccurring gymnastic like flexibility to pick right up off the ground and condense into a maliable dough, during intercourse and hammer down. Usually lifted at as extreme as 180° bends by the 'pretzels' knee joints. Followed by wrapping their arms around their own legs. This allows for maximum hammer time.

Ex. Person 1: Hi, so nice to meet you. I absolutely love pretzels

Person 2: (in absolute speechless confusion) great?

Person 1: Pretzel fuck. A pretzel. You're a Pretzel.

Person 2: Jesus Christ.

Person 1: hey you're a pretzel
Person 2: I'm sorry I'm a what?

Person 1: I'd Pretzel fuck the shit out of you.
Person 2: my God you need Jesus.

by Travey James January 6, 2020

Go warm up a pretzel

To go fuck yourself.

Why don't you just go warm up a pretzel.

by asdfweasdfwea December 3, 2021

The Pretzels of the Party Mix

A boring person in a group of friends. Kinda needed in some respects, but never the center of attention. Conclusion: don't be this person.

God damn you, Joey, you're the pretzels of the party mix.

by SammySlimJim March 15, 2017

fuzzy pretzel

v. the act of eating out a female who has contracted a sexually transmitted disease

Hey, did you hear Jake gave that stripper a fuzzy pretzel and now he has herpes on his mouth?!

by Walsh 120 September 25, 2011

sticky pretzel

An Israeli slang concerning the act of shoving a hot pretzel up an Americans left nostril.

"Hey Yisra'el, do you want to sticky pretzel that Jerry over there?"
"sure thing lets go"

by extracrispytea November 11, 2019

Pretzel

The act of placing both legs of a woman over your shoulders while doing the no pants dance to form a pretzel like form and bringing her to orgasm.

Guy 1: So I heard you and Megan hooked up last night??
Guy 2: Yeah I took her to town and put dat bitch in a pretzel before giving her a creampie.
Guy 1: AHHH SICK BRO

by Grrruff98 August 6, 2018

mushy lemon pretzel

Heinous sexual act. Sub folds limbs into a pretzel shape, Dom cuts a lemon in half and squeezes juice into Sub's asshole, then leaves the two halves of the lemon on top of the nipples of Sub while sodomizing him/her.

Girl 1: Hey, I heard you and Derek are into crazy sex.

Girl 2: Yeah, it's ridiculous. Last night we did this thing called the mushy lemon pretzel. It's insane.
Girl 1: Oh? I've never heard of that one. Sounds tangy

by jmat9001 April 11, 2016