Hand Job Soup

Hand Job Soup; When a man spends a minimum of 24 hours doing nothing more then jerking off and collecting his cum in his empty roman noodle soup bowl.

Guy: Yo bro whats up?

Bro: nothing to much just been on my couch all day cooking.

Guy: Yo Say what? Cooking on your couch?

Bro: yeah man just been smacking it all day and shooting my loads in a bowl.

Guy: AHH man I was busy making hand job soup all last week for my bitch to eat ahhhahaha!

by Somanking June 10, 2011

The Hand Before Time

The Hand Before Time is a sexual act where a woman with a little T-rex arm gives a man an old fashioned.

That homeless lady outside the liquor store used her little gimp arm to give Steve a The hand before time.

by Ron J. Livingston December 14, 2010

Dick In My Hand

It could be a reference to male pride, but in order to explain Sonny's usage of the phrase in The Godfather, it goes a little deeper. The word dick can also mean "nothing", and in Sonny's case I think "hand" has a double meaning. He means it literally and figuratively. If it's a reference to male pride, it's in the sense of the phrase "wearing only a smile", meaning that Michael would come out of the bathroom with nothing but his pride. More literally, Sonny wanted Michael to actually have the gun in his hand when he exited the men's room.

Sonny: I don't want my brother coming out of that bathroom with just his dick in his hand.

Michael: Don't worry, I won't have my dick in my hand anyway.

by fizzle December 28, 2005

dead man's hand

the act of masturbating with a numb hand, preferrably after sitting on the desired hand.

"hey joony, i did the dead man's hand yesterday"
"did it really feel like a handjob?"

by destroyer of memes April 15, 2015

Hannibal Hand Job

When a fat older woman rubs Paprika on the genitals of a miserable old queen of a man. Often followed by demolishing his house with food from the refridgerator and/or causing a domestic dispute. Named for the small town that pioneered the practice, Hannibal, NY.

Billy got hauled off to jail after his ex gave him the Hannibal Hand Job.

by David VanDyke November 8, 2006

hand-to-cock resuscitation

A medical procedure performed by busty nurses to alleviate all forms of physical and psychological pain in male patients by increasing the bloodflow to the penis using their hands.

Jim had lost both arms, one leg, an eye and six fingers in the accident. Realising how much pain he was in, Nurse Flanders came to his rescue, alleviating the pain via hand-to-cock resuscitation

by Susanna Katyn August 10, 2009

hillbilly hand fucking

the act of shoving ur fist deep into a womans vagina as if fishing for catfish

thats trucker bitch had a nice body so i threw a paper bag over her head and took her hillbilly hand fucking

by E grizzly September 13, 2011