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jesus

a name that you cant legally call your kid because the word contains the word sus
guy1: jesus, more like je (sus)
guy2: getoutofmyheadgetoutofmyheadgetoutofmyheadgetoutofmyheadgetoutofmyheadgetoutofmyheadgetoutofmyhead
by rory senpai May 8, 2021
mugGet the jesusmug.

Jesus it’s early

When you wake up at 3 in the afternoon and need a beer.
Jesus it’s early, lys, get me a beer!
by Junior A god August 1, 2018
mugGet the Jesus it’s earlymug.

Jesus family tomb

Is a tomp found in Isreal also called the Talpiot tomb. It was first brought to the attention of the world in a book called "The Jesus family tomb" by Simcha Jacobovici and Charles R. Pellegrino.
In the tomb there are the ossuaries that contain the bones of a family that brears all the names of Jesus in the bible. It has been estimated by a mathematician that the odds of it being the tomb of Jesus are 600 to 1 in favour of it being Jesus' tomb.
This is one of those things that fundamentalist don't want you to know because it would mean Jesus didn't rise from the dead.
Have you read the Jesus family tomb?
by Deep blue 2012 August 8, 2010
mugGet the Jesus family tombmug.

Jesus

A guy named Jesus has many talents and is really good at being a dick when needed. But if you leave him alone, he can be a great friend, partner and lover. But the moment you push his buttons he’ll give you hell.
Someone-Why haven’t you done this?

Jesus- bitch mind your own business.
by Sausage! My ass!. November 23, 2021
mugGet the Jesusmug.

Jesus Christ

A man who loved you so much that he died for you. The man you were designed to love from the beginning. He is your missing piece and the only thing that can make you feel whole again! He created an entire universe to show you how special you truly are, and even allowed you to follow him into heaven despite how horrible all of man kind treats him. Constantly using his name in vein, cursing people out, murdering without reason, lying(includes not telling the whole truth), stealing, and many more things that we don't even know are wrong. But that's why Jesus died! So that we can accept the gift he offers us (eternity with him) so that we can feel his awesome love! You may think I'm wrong and want to disprove me, and you might think you have though you haven't! Because his existence is a proven fact along with his resurrection, his love, and us being his creation.

You may have questions like "well why hasn't he came to earth"
He did and we killed him.
Or maybe you're wondering "then who created God?"
You think something without a beginning needs a beginning, but scientists say that the universe didn't begin at a point in time either. It just "was". God just "was" as well. Except he wasn't suddenly just "was" he was always "was". Believing the universe came from a spec of nothing is probably worse than believing in the existence of God when you look at everything these scientists really say.
Person: Jesus Christ died for you!
by #Faithinhim February 26, 2024
mugGet the Jesus Christmug.

Gentle Jesus

the greatest song made by the greatest band "uncle's gun"
man, I love Gentle Jesus by uncle's gun, its the best song in the world!
by Bone Cane May 28, 2024
mugGet the Gentle Jesusmug.

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