A fury wank is when you furiously jerk-off to alleviate the symptoms of extreme blue balls quickly in the bathroom when you realize the girl you're with in the house won't blow you, done as quickly as possible to make her think its only a massive piss or a quick shit
"Shit man, the fury wank I had to do last night was mad!"
"Sorry babe, just gotta bust a fury.. I mean, take a piss!"
"Sorry babe, just gotta bust a fury.. I mean, take a piss!"
by Radioleg August 28, 2014
Masturbation, not initiated out of sexual arousal, but to achieve a goal, like relieving pressure or to become tired.
I couldn't sleep, so I utility wanked.
I wasn't even horny, it was just a utility wank so I could go to sleep.
I wasn't even horny, it was just a utility wank so I could go to sleep.
by Germaggeddon January 08, 2013
The act of masturbating in your living room while trying to get caught by the Google Street View car.
As soon as I saw the car coming round the corner by the Bradworthy Inn, I ran home, flopped it out and start it furiously Bashing the Bishop, in the hopes that the image of me choking my chicken would live forever on Google Street View.
Best Bradworthy Wank I ever had.
Best Bradworthy Wank I ever had.
by EducatedBumpkin March 26, 2022
That feeling you get once you've finished a filthy wank. When you are lying in bed, jizz everywhere, and you can see a mans balls bouncing around your laptop screen. The lowest feeling of all.
had the biggest wank wallow this morning, everything was great until that moment just after i came. Grim
by seanysean23 January 30, 2015
A person(s) who literally fires there seaman a large distance.
i.e. hitting your hair, shoulder or over your head and splatting it on every-day items.
i.e. hitting your hair, shoulder or over your head and splatting it on every-day items.
Jack: Where did it go?
Sally: I can't find it!
Jack: Oh, its on the curtains.
Sally: Wow! You're a real wank cannon Jack.
Sally: I can't find it!
Jack: Oh, its on the curtains.
Sally: Wow! You're a real wank cannon Jack.
by vValentine February 04, 2010
Masterbation with the lights off.
Tim: I'm all about saving the planet, I even have Eco Wanks.
Mike: What the hell is that?!
Tim: Oh I just masterbate with the lights off.
Mike: Get away from me.
Mike: What the hell is that?!
Tim: Oh I just masterbate with the lights off.
Mike: Get away from me.
by magicalg March 14, 2010
To wank under extreme horror or terror, usually under extreme, life or death circumstances as a last attempt at pleasure. Characterized by furious masturbation accompanied by screams and shouts.
Captain Bob: "Attention passengers, fasten all safety belts-we are heading for a crash landing."
Terrified passenger: "Time for a terror wank..." *Fap fap fap*
Terrified passenger: "Time for a terror wank..." *Fap fap fap*
by Nickwalks October 26, 2011