Screaming Jesus

A FICTIONAL sexual "maneuver" that you would apply to a person you don't particularly like (or in some cases- hate), but still want to have sexual intercourse because they are extremely hot.

It is a maneuver specifically made up for fantasy purposes only- as the other person would die. It involves you nailing the A-hole/ Bitch to a cross, and then nailing him/ her (with consent).

Paul: "Damn, Bob's sister is a total Bitch. Did you hear what she said?"
Tom: "I know, what a total Bitch. She's really hot though."
Paul: "I know- I'd like to give that bitch the screaming Jesus."
Tom: "Me too, man."

by JemIsJerrica September 25, 2009

fish jesus

idk my mom yelled at me for saying it so i figured it was on here.

I swear to fish jesus!

by totally not an 11 year old May 16, 2015

Juiced Jesus

To be toned and muscular, while having long majestic hair and an almost Chuck Norris like beard. *Tattoos are not required, but recommended.*

Man, Opie from Sons of Anarchy really became a Juiced Jesus in season 4 of the show.

by Ulta-Thug MD. June 12, 2015

black jesus

A term referring to an African American with extraordinary talent.

Michael Jordan advised the player who was guarding him not to mess wih "black Jesus."

by Originnone May 22, 2016

Metal Jesus

The entity talking in certain Iced Earth songs like "Melancholy" (legendary btw.), and creeping into many other supposedly purely "metal" acts.

When Metal Jesus takes over metal you almost might not notice any change in your metal playlist.

by felixh July 2, 2016

marijuana jesus

marijuana jesus is a person who smokes the holy plant cannabis, walks on water, and is made up.

marijuana jesus: that was some nice bud judas
judas: im gonna go betray you and smoke all your weed

by marijuana jesus December 9, 2016

fried jesus

a man who makes the most delicious cannibalistic fried food. oh yes he makes it delicious....

Aw man, he's such a fried jesus

by DilandRick January 12, 2017