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turd burglar

Someone who simply steals your poop. You could be taking a nice dump, not knowing what’s hiding in your shower, or under your sink… as soon as you stand up from the toilet and turn away for a second… your turd will be gone because the turd burglar took it. You will not catch them… nor see them.. unless they’re over 34 years of age. They are either assigned to a person at the age of 6, or placed into a house when built, and will steal everyone’s turds that ever lives there.
Frank - “Yo… I just took a shit, and when I turned around to flush… it wasn’t there”

Marlo- “oh, it was probably the turd burglar
by Stinkletoot May 26, 2024
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We've had Polish burglars

A term used to try and cover up the fact that you have wet yourself - usually under the influence of alcohol. It derives from the tendency of Eastern European thieves to urinate in the houses they break in to.
Carston: Dude, I hope you don't mind me stopping by. I was in your hood
DeAndre: It's trill man. I just sittin here drinking
Carlton: whoa dude what is that smell. It smells like piss. And are your pants wet?
DeAndre: oh, er, um. I think we've had Polish burglars.

That night Juan Carlos drank two litres of Tequila all by himself. About two thirds of the way through the second, he has Polish burglars.
by Trill_LV December 25, 2014
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Burglarization

Yuh wan kno the English word for this?! BURGLARIZATION!”
by Loco brazy November 19, 2019
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Smurf burglar

A person, generally a major asshole, that is such an asshole he would literally rob smurfs in their sleep. Who would rob the harmless smurfs?
That guy's misogynistic comment just shows everyone how much of a Smurf burglar he is, what an asshole.
by Nathaniel S. January 13, 2022
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Turd burglar

When my dog sniffs the yard for rabbit poops...and eats them.
"Baxter!...quit being a turd burglar and leave them rabbit turds alone. You better give mama kisses first with that breath!" 🤭
by YOU DONT SAY June 27, 2025
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Turd Burglar

One who takes shit or allows themself to be spoken down to by others.
“Poor Jeff, he always allows his boss to talk down to him, poor turd burglar
by Sir Francis Argaf June 8, 2022
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Turd Burglar

A person who inserts other people's feces inside his/hers own rectum in an effort to obtain any nutrients that could remain.
Put that poop stick down you turd burglar, those are my Nutrients !
by NotTimothyDalton October 19, 2016
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