Laser Jesus 

when somebody says laser jesus they mean a speed control camera. the word itself comes from the ancient sayings that jesus saved a lot of lives. Laser Jesus = a version of jesus that saves lives through laser beams.

GPS: "Laser Jesus coming up in 150 yards, slow down."

Laser Jesus by Hakif July 29, 2009

since jesus was an embryo 

This phrase, often used in Navy circles especially by Benz's while chastising wannabes, means "for a fucking long time."

"You guys have been here since Jesus was an embryo and you still can't do the Chief run!"

since jesus was an embryo by Billy B Bad February 15, 2015

omar jesus 

A chubby prison lesbian with a weird and small penis.

"Oh look at that Omar Jesus she is always hungry"

"When is that omar jesus chick getting out of prison?"

omar jesus by Gordapata May 5, 2015

latino jesus 

I guy that likes to flirt a shit load and usually gets girls to flirt back......but not in front of their boyfriend.he is amazing at pulling in girls,but People close to him don't think that.side hoes are easy for him, now all he needs is a Maine girl

Latino jesus:hey you got nice tits
Girl1: thanks(;
Jesus:can I touch them .
Girl 1: sure....wait my bf coming get away

latino jesus by Dhdudifh April 22, 2017

Stinky Jesus 

When a person drags their hand across their butthole and smacks you in the face with it. Similar to a Wet Jesus.

Whenever I try to touch my boyfriend's asshole during sex, he panics and gives me a Stinky Jesus.

Stinky Jesus by WetWaterPark July 5, 2017

Hispanic Jesus 

Sebestian

When Sebastian joins the server we will crown him Hispanic Jesus

Hispanic Jesus by Urban-Kick January 8, 2019

All Jesus 

Also meaning it's okay don't worry no problem it's cool or it's all Jesus hats Jesus was good so it's all good

Don't worry about it it's all Jesus

All Jesus by HOODBILLY March 29, 2019