(SHSJ)- Typically a male with medium to long hair and a thin , patchy mustache. Goons to hentai and insta reels. LIVES on his computer. Will message first but begins growing distant after you message back.
He WILL ask why you like why you do, when you ask him to clarify he send back “why you like, why you do”. NEVER attempt to make a joke outside his “humor”.
His “humor” includes:
young children/infants get injured in various ways.
Women sitting on cake
Sexual jokes-especially to people younger than him
He spends his days scrolling Instagram, finding young women to DM. If said women continue to DM him outside his designated Instagram IM time.
Be warned, if you try to open up to him about on going harassment from men of whom are significantly older, he WILL tell you-
“You’re not being harassed, you’re just uncomfortable.”
HE IS DANGEROUS. DO NOT ENGAGE.
Theodore, come home the kids miss you.
He WILL ask why you like why you do, when you ask him to clarify he send back “why you like, why you do”. NEVER attempt to make a joke outside his “humor”.
His “humor” includes:
young children/infants get injured in various ways.
Women sitting on cake
Sexual jokes-especially to people younger than him
He spends his days scrolling Instagram, finding young women to DM. If said women continue to DM him outside his designated Instagram IM time.
Be warned, if you try to open up to him about on going harassment from men of whom are significantly older, he WILL tell you-
“You’re not being harassed, you’re just uncomfortable.”
HE IS DANGEROUS. DO NOT ENGAGE.
Theodore, come home the kids miss you.
There are currently ELEVEN Stretch Harmstrong Junior’s in the world. ZERO of which use shampoo :(. OnlY FOURTEEN can co-exist at a time. Abraham LINCOLN was a SHSJ, especially when he visited HAGERSTOWN.
by Str8OuttaChiraq June 29, 2025
Get the Stretch Harmstrong Juniormug. by Sir Osiss of Liver March 8, 2024
Get the 7th inning stretchmug. When a girl's pussy is extremely hairy and her beef curtains are extremely big at the same time. It usually smells funny too; like a wet dog.
"Oh man I was gonna bang her last night but she had the biggest stretching wookie, dude. It was the grossed thing I'd ever seen so I high tailed the fuck outta there.
by 4n4l monster for BenQ July 10, 2016
Get the stretching wookiemug. by Laju Keebu Inu July 12, 2019
Get the butterfly stretchmug. by kornball May 14, 2025
Get the ultimate stretchmug. After having caught feelings for someone but not telling them thereby keeping yourself in an awkward and miserable state. You go through the stages of anxiety, sadness, and butterfly belly. It's terrible.
Jaimie: "Hey! What's up with Jackson? Is he okay?"
Jill: "I can't tell you the whole story, but he's in a bad way. He's beyond smitten for someone unavailable for months."
Jaime: "Yikes! So he's just stretching feelings? He needs to do something and do it fast!"
Jill: "I know. If he don't he'll soon be pisserable. He's such a sweetheart. I really feel for him."
Jill: "I can't tell you the whole story, but he's in a bad way. He's beyond smitten for someone unavailable for months."
Jaime: "Yikes! So he's just stretching feelings? He needs to do something and do it fast!"
Jill: "I know. If he don't he'll soon be pisserable. He's such a sweetheart. I really feel for him."
by von groovy June 26, 2024
Get the stretching feelingsmug. A teenager or adult that has such a strong baby face that they look like a kid in photographs from the neck up, but they are an average adult height or taller and may have adult body proportions. It is strong enough to cause the uncanny valley, especially if it’s a man with a beard.
by Dr. Sigh January 27, 2021
Get the Stretched childmug.