News Handjob

Reading news for the sole purpose of confirming your own beliefs.

Instead of reading the NYT or the Washington Post Rob is getting a news handjob by clicking on Brietbart
a news hand job

by Johnny Cos December 15, 2017

Danish Handjob

A conventional handjob - though not to completion - wherein the receiver alternates between stroking the shaft and painfully crushing the testicles.

I was in my car with my latest guy-friend the other day, and I totally gave him a Danish Handjob.

by Mr Monotony June 2, 2018

Muppet Handjob

Receiving a hand job with a sock with googly eyes.

Yo dude, she gave me a Muppet Handjob!

What's that?

Receiving a hand job with a sock on my dick with googly eyes.

by Buffalo Bourbon Lady December 5, 2019

National Handjob Day

National Handjob Day is on May 10th. On this day, any guy is authorized to ask a girl of their choice to give them a handjob.

A: “Hey, it’s National Handjob day today. Wanna give me a handjob?”
B: “Sure, come over to my place!”

by Coronavaaarus April 21, 2020

school handbook

Basically the Terms of Service for a school or university. Just like the regular terms, nobody obviously reads it but they still break a few of its rules.

Before you attend your first year here, you better read our school handbook!

by The Real Driller October 8, 2020

Cuban handjob

It it where you wrap the mans penis in tobacco leaves when he ejaculates u then roll up the tobacco leaf and smoke his cum.

Lisa gives the best Cuban handjobs

by ahatch52 November 20, 2020

Santa Handjob

An orgy activity in which several men lay naked next to each other while another person strokes their penises, one stroke at a time, going along the row of men, repeating as necessary until each man has ejaculated. It is named for its similarity in nature to the tale of Santa Claus, who enters homes through their chimneys to deliver presents and then quickly leaves, with the penises representing the chimneys and the hand representing Santa. Can also be done as a competition to see which man can last the longest.

Coworker 1: You gonna show up to the company Christmas party?
Coworker 2: As long as I don't have to witness a Santa Handjob like last year, then sure.
Coworker 1: I doubt that'll happen, that shit got three people fired.

by prismcheeto November 25, 2020