Jetway Jesus

When people fake the use of a wheelchair to get early boarding on a flight, but when the flight lands and they are miraculously able to walk off the plane on their own two feet, they've been "healed" by Jetway Jesus.

My flight yesterday had 10 people who needed wheelchairs to board and only two who needed wheelchairs to get off. Jetway Jesus must've been really busy on that flight!

by ahirebet July 23, 2024

Jesus cable

A type of cable that will send you or anyone who uses it to the afterlife (or to see Jesus)

Tech A:"Don't use that cable"
Normie:"Why"
Tech B:"It's a Jesus cable, and it'll kill you"

by afuckingtech February 11, 2024

Pulled a Jesus

Getting someone a gift for your own birthday?

"Dude you're gonna love my gift for you"
"Isn't it your birthday?"
"I pulled a Jesus"

by themagnificentstarfish March 30, 2024

Jesus

Homo walking hairy pig.
Likes ducks and is covered in pimples

The pig eats jesus is the same as saying jesus eats the jesus or jesus eats the pig or the pig eats the pig. All same meaning m8

by Showi April 19, 2018

jesus serpent

when a serpent is as hot as jug head and as daddy material as FP with the hot as hell persona of toni

"NO MOM Kanye West is a jesus serpent not bill cosby" or also

"damn i'd like to smash that jesus serpant of a man they call jimmy fallon"

by kindofanicon June 12, 2018

Jesus

Jesus is a god name. Although a lot of people have this name it is very unique. Jesus is a very trustworthy person you can trust him on anything and he knows he can trust you. Jesus well treat you right if you treat him right. He is powerful in many certain ways. Jesus can be there whenever you want he is a nice person,and he can protect you.he is a special person. He can be a little bit dorky but just to make you Lough.

Jesus helped me last night

Me and jesus had fun

by Jiisuspo July 17, 2018

Jesus

The thing that suffers and dies arbitrarily at the hands of the Schizophrenic horde. You should be this (so I don't have to... I'd rather be a part of the horde. Or the guy that tells them to do it to you)

Hym "What the fuck? No. Jesus Christ! How about instead of trying to imitate everything you see (like the stupid filth monkeys that you are) you just acknowledge that it was not a good thing to do to a guy and don't do that? But hey, don't listen to me. I'm not a doctor."

by Hym Iam July 23, 2022