Creepy Jesus

The demon of Jesus who lurks in your hallways at night 😈

“CREEPY JESUS IS GONNA GET ME”

by JesusLover2028 August 29, 2022

jesus chrust

1. A misspelling of Jesus Christ
2. A man who died for your crust

"You going to church today?" "Nah, I'm going to chirch." "What's that?" "It's where you can go and worship our lord and savior Jesus Chrust." "Go fuck yourself."

by Communistically-Delicious May 3, 2018

Jesus Boob Cult

The Jesus Boob Cult is a place where fags share trauma and a love of phoebe Bridgers while drinking Jesus’s period blood and eating his boobs. The JBC is very selective of its members and will only allow the gayest of the fags and the gayest of the straights to participate in its rituals.

Person one: are you in the Jesus Boob Cult????
Person two: yes but I’m not supposed to tell anyone
Person one: WHAT how did you get accepted, I’ve been trying to get in for months!

by JBC is life September 24, 2021

testing my Jesus

When someone pisses you off due to their rude, or otherwise bad behavior, and you begin to lose faith in humanity, that person is testing my Jesus

Can you believe Monica? I babysat her cat, picked her up from the airport, and took her to the mall when her car was dead - but when I need a favor, and I wouldn't really call it a favor if she's my bestie, she disappears like a cockroach when the lights come on. Friends like that be testing my Jesus.

by Siouxsie Supertramp November 20, 2023

Jesus Karma

When Christians want to comment and rely on the concept of karma but without all the Pagan underpinnings.

After Dave yelled at his children for no reason, he got a flat tire on the way to work. That's a little Jesus Karma right there.

by Jayzues July 24, 2012

Jesus

When you see a nice body or something very tragic

1. Jesus that ass is fat.
2. Jesus man no one should die that way.

by jamezey October 8, 2021

Jesus Solos

He is Him. He’s stronger, faster, smarter. Bro solos all of fiction and non-fiction. He transcends that which is us. He is just that guy.

Guy: Bro Naruto no diffs Luffy.

Guy 2: But can he beat Goku?

Guy 3: The fact they all got nothing on Jesus says a lot doesn’t it?

Guy: Wdym?

Guy 3: Jesus Solos in his sleep 😴

by Roronoa Musashi December 19, 2022