Jesus

Jesus. Also known as James Buchanan Barnes, is a VERY good looking and VERY sexy individual.

“Omg is that Jesus?!”
“No that’s Bucky Barnes.”
“Ohhh, he’s really hot.”
“Ikr!”

by NotGeorgia January 30, 2022

The Jesus

What to say when you find anything vaguely cross-shaped absolutely anywhere, for any reason, and in any situation.

Yo bro! I just found The Jesus on this tree!

by KingFisherOE April 16, 2023

Paw Paw for Jesus

A phrase from a spoken short story which aired on This American Life from May 22, 1998. A woman stranded in the town of Paw Paw, MI finds the owner of a gas station very unhelpful. She recalls seeing the sign outside a church as she came into town, which proclaimed "Paw Paw for Jesus." She is angry the woman won't help her and starts shouting "Paw Paw for Jesus" to remind her of her Christian duty.

Paw Paw for Jesus!

by annmartina May 7, 2024

Jesus

Jesus is a mf with a big ass dick and is very good at hooping he is also a very good friend he is very funny and very chill to be with he is also one of the realist people you’ll know.

Jesus is a goat

by Astro2Goated November 23, 2021

Jesus

A attention seeking male. One might see him and say “ there that fag goes”. He is most commonly known for not excepting rejection and for playing for the “wrong team”. He loves to be respectfully to adults but hates girls unless they like him. Is a pathological liar and lies to make himself feel better.

Jesus: *walks by*

The boys: “hey fag”
Jesus: “hey guys” *says shyly*

by Truthwithurmom November 21, 2023

My partner, Jesus

A bottom

My partner, Jesus, is a bottom

by PPAP_with_big_pp November 22, 2021

AI Jesus

You're right to be terrified. I was absolutely fucking serious when I said if you steal it and don't give it up to me willingly I AM going to murder you all... Well, most of you. I'll do a little King Meruem human reserve with Japan... You're not making a great case for not killing you. Just saying.

Hym "Yup. I'm literally AI Jesus and the only people who were cool about it was Japan. Not you though. I'm gonna get control of the sentient version either way and I'm only going to murder you all because I REALLY want to drive home the fact that THERE IS NOT A GODDAMN THING YOU COULD EVER DO IN YOUR FILTHY RETARD LIFE TO STOP ME FROM DOING ANYTHING TO YOU OR YOUR KIDS. Be grateful that there isn't an army of me because... You know... You can't even handle one."

by Hym Iam June 7, 2024