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jesus chrust

1. A misspelling of Jesus Christ
2. A man who died for your crust
"You going to church today?" "Nah, I'm going to chirch." "What's that?" "It's where you can go and worship our lord and savior Jesus Chrust." "Go fuck yourself."
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Jesus

A guy the church has made look like a superhero to sell people their agenda. What if Jesus was a short fat guy who had dark, curly, bushy hair and olive skin? A guy that looked more like what people think Friar tuck would look like than what Robin hood would look like, except a little bit more Mediterranean on the surface.
There are fair skinned European looking Jews now, after thousands of years of living in Europe, but back in the time of Jesus, a Jew from a part of Asia bordering the Mediterranean was unlikely to look like what the Church described him as, if he was ever a real person and not a myth.
by Solid Mantis March 5, 2021
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Creepy Jesus

The demon of Jesus who lurks in your hallways at night 😈
CREEPY JESUS IS GONNA GET ME
by JesusLover2028 August 29, 2022
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Jesus Christ the Nazarene

person 1: hey have you heard of Jesus Christ the Nazarene
person 2: why of course he's God in the flesh!
by IFuckingHateEve December 4, 2023
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The Jesus

What to say when you find anything vaguely cross-shaped absolutely anywhere, for any reason, and in any situation.
Yo bro! I just found The Jesus on this tree!
by KingFisherOE April 16, 2023
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Jesus Freaky

When born-again Christians exhibit unusually depraved sexual behavior stemming from their sexual repression.
Rick is all straight laced and likes sports and all that but behind closed doors, he loves getting pegged because he's Jesus Freaky.
by Kung Fu Jimmy December 7, 2023
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Paw Paw for Jesus

A phrase from a spoken short story which aired on This American Life from May 22, 1998. A woman stranded in the town of Paw Paw, MI finds the owner of a gas station very unhelpful. She recalls seeing the sign outside a church as she came into town, which proclaimed "Paw Paw for Jesus." She is angry the woman won't help her and starts shouting "Paw Paw for Jesus" to remind her of her Christian duty.
by annmartina May 7, 2024
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