When you've been spanking the monkey for an hour or more, doing your hand mantra and exceptional kamasutra to almost, almost, almost.. ..and then finally release a load so great it's almost comparable to sex - this is what we call an epic wank.
-I just had the most epic wank last night, to some epic xxx.
-The moment of which my tremendous load shot through the canal of my penis and shot out after the two hours of holding it in can only be described as absolute bliss, nothing like taking a piss.
-*shooting out the biggest load*. Wow. What an epic wank.
-The moment of which my tremendous load shot through the canal of my penis and shot out after the two hours of holding it in can only be described as absolute bliss, nothing like taking a piss.
-*shooting out the biggest load*. Wow. What an epic wank.
by utterduck 9k May 11, 2010
“Me and Joe are epic gamers bitch back away mortal scum I hold the world record time killing the ender dragon”
by The unfunny false definition G March 12, 2019
An explanation whereby the enjoyability and longevity of an event/situation is increased exponentially by the inclusion of an unforeseen factor or person.
Dude - I was getting laid, but it was pretty average. But then her mom turned up and wanted in, then it was epic batter
by rockoroll May 19, 2011
an unpleasant sex move in which the girl ends up making a painful squealing sound similar to mickey mouse's classic "a ha" sound
I knew my girlfriend had been cheating on me, so last night I gave her the epic mickey and at that moment she knew that I knew
by piffman2 October 20, 2009
The highest form of fail known to man. Reaching this level of fail means only one thing:
You must die, or the world will fail itself due to such an extreme level of failage.
You must die, or the world will fail itself due to such an extreme level of failage.
<Noob>:OMG I gotz teh myspaces n mah yootoobs rool n sutf n u sux cuz u has no myscapes!
<Me>: Epic fail.
<Me>: Epic fail.
by Lawligation October 27, 2007
"Epic Movie looks like a piece of crap."
by Brody K. January 10, 2007
Epic Games, Inc. is a software development corporation. They are mainly known for creating the popular battle royale game, Fortnite. Epic Games is also known for their terrible customer service and horrible support features. They enjoy banning Fortnite users for using exploits that Epic Games does not remove. Sometimes it seems Epic Games does not truly care about how their users feel rather, they only care about the money... Tisk, tisk, tisk
Person contacting Epic Games: "Hello, I recently lost all my guns in Save The World because the game kicked me and my friends. It said 'We Hit a Roadblock' and something along the lines of 'Unable to save data.'
Epic Games: "Thank you for submitting your request. A member of our Player Support Team will respond as quickly as possible."
*Four Days Later*
Person contacting Epic Games: "Are you even going to respond?"
Epic Games: "Thank you for submitting your request. A member of our Player Support Team will respond as quickly as possible."
Epic Games: "Thank you for submitting your request. A member of our Player Support Team will respond as quickly as possible."
*Four Days Later*
Person contacting Epic Games: "Are you even going to respond?"
Epic Games: "Thank you for submitting your request. A member of our Player Support Team will respond as quickly as possible."
by MathO24 August 12, 2018