National break up day 

National break up day is always the first Wednesday in May.....Do it to your spouse but it’s made of a joke....but if he/she takes it seriously that’s on you.....but it has to to be played out for 24 hrs

Boyfriend: I’m breaking up with you

Girlfriend: how could you I loved you so much

24 hrs later

Boyfriend: baby it was a joke I could never leave you

Girlfriend: Awww I love you to baby don’t do that again though

Boyfriend: what it’s national break up day

Girlfriend: ......

National break up day by David feldabeldum June 5, 2019

Cheat Day 

The one day of the week when people dieting can eat whatever they please

Sara : Oh Jake you cock is so strong! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh!
Jake : Yeah and your pussy is so soft! Ahhh! Ahhh! Ahhh!
Kiersten : Hey Jake I brought us some goodies since it's Cheat Day! OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!
Jake : You said Sunday was Cheat Day so I thought we could fuck other people!
Kiersten : You DUMBASS we can cheat on our diet not each other GOD DAMNT!
Sara : Oh Jake I'm CUMMING I'm CUMMING!
Jake : Ohhh! It feels so good in there!
Kiersten : JAKE GET YOUR DICK OUT OF HER NOW!
Jake : But it's Cheat Day!
Kiersten : That's It today is BEAT DAY cause I'm gonna beat the shit out of you two!

Cheat Day by SlopNChop March 12, 2018

Valentine's Day 

A commercialized holiday that is designed to make you and your "significant other" fall in love even more. Or, gives you the opportunity to tell your "crush" that you love them and what not. But really just ends up making 90% of the population depressed and lonely. Also causing a lot of girls to get typical gifts with no originality whatsoever because they advertise every girl wanting a rose and a box of chocolates.

Him: "Here honey I bought you a dozen roses"
Her: "Oh, how original, thanks honey" in a complete sarcastic tone while thinking, wow another dozen rozes i can display for 2 days then throw away.

Valentine's Day by Amer February 14, 2005

National Rape Day 

A day where rape is acceptable (it is never acceptable, if you rape sombody, rot in hell!). This day was made by men who think rape is funny and not something that is harmful. They also think harrasment, pedophilia, sexual harrasment, and much more is acceptable. Rape is a horrible thing. Stay safe ladies and all those who identify as female. It is said to be April 24th, so be extra careful. Try to have an item to protect yourself with at all times; taser, pepper spray, knife (if legal), brass knuckles or knuckle knives. A pen is also somewhat effective. Your elbow is a very strong bone. Stay safe y'all.

Someone identified as male: *whistles or tries to touch identified female*
Someone identified as female: leave me alone
Someone identified as male: chill shawty, its national rape day *says slurs of any sort*
Someone identified as female: that's not a real thing, leave me the fuck alone
Someone identified as male: *tries to get substantially closer*
Someone identified as female: *staps (with self defense object), jabs male in face with elbow or kick in crotch area, anything and runs*

remember, you are valid, you are not an object, stay safe. or at lease know how to use your elbow bone to jab. also you can keep a pen in your posession to stap with.

National Rape Day by a girl who cares about people April 14, 2021

national dick sucking day 

on april 12th kendal crist and paige daugherty can suck as much dick as they can until the clock hits midnight. suck me dry girls!

paige: omg i sucked 7 dicks!

kendal: bro i sucked 12 tf but it’s okay cause it’s national dick sucking day!

national dick sucking day by lilly bunch April 11, 2019

Hacky Sack Day 

The first sunday of the month shall be devoted to hacky sack.

April 3, 2005

It begins

Hacky Sack Day by Jeremy March 28, 2005

Labor Day 

Labor Day is a United States federal holiday observed on the first Monday in September (September 5 in 2011) that celebrates the economic and social contributions of workers. (Wiki)

Guy1: "WTF is Labor Day anyways?"
Guy2: "It's meant to celebrate the economic and social something or other of workers."

Labor Day by opsoyo September 7, 2011