la canada

Well, what is there to say? There isn't anything to do, for one. Nobody between the ages of eighteen and fourty lives here. That's because the only reason that anybody would ever consider moving to La Canada is because the schools are second best in California behind San Marino. We would be first, but they are like 90 percent Asian.

The only good things in the city are Imports, Georgie's, Sport Chalet, and truly rediculous amounts of Smirnoff and weed (if you like that kind of thing). It's a really good thing that Pasadena isn't too far away.

I live in LA. Well, actually just outside of it in La Canada, but you've never heard of it. It sucks.

by B-reggin May 19, 2007

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united states of canada

Where former Jesuslanders go when they realize that the government is supposed to take care of everybody by forcing money from those who have it and giving it to those who don't.

Contrast with Jesusland where people think that the church is supposed to take care of everybody by extracting money from anyone who will listen and building a bigger cathedral than the Jones' church down the street.

I moved to the United States of Canada after my preacher took my baby's milk money and bought an Xbox for his church's new million dollar youth building.

by hoglahoo March 16, 2008

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Canada's History

a sexual act designed to tell a story through symbolic devices: specifically in this case, that story is the history of Canada. As an element of foreplay, the man pours some maple syrup on the woman's body, and licks it off of her abdomen, breasts, nipples, and vulva in that respective order. In honor of Samuel De Champlain's voyage by canoe through Lake Nipissing, the man rubs is penis lengthwise along the woman's vulva, and she bears down hard to spray his genitals with her urine. Then the man and woman perform oral sex on each other, burying their faces in each other's pubic hair, representing the fur trade. The man has intercourse with the woman doggy style, while slapping her buttocks vigorously, representing the French and Indian Wars. He also fists the woman's vagina; however she subsequently fists the man's anus; this exchange represents the War of 1812. After this point in history, Canada is known mostly for participatory, but not pivotal roles in world affairs. Therefore, any combination of missionary position and fingering are used to bring the woman to orgasm, representing the post-WWII prosperity of the country. Finally, the man ejaculates all over the woman's face, representing the sovereignty of Quebec.

Wife: I just feel like there isn't any excitement in our sex life, eh.

Husband: I think it's that we just don't have enough energy after all our other responsibilities, eh, the kids, work.

Marriage Counselor: Like I haven't heard that a trillion fucking times, eh!! You two should learn Canada's History like any responsible citizens would! Now get the fuck out and fuck!!!

by Guffaw February 5, 2010

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canada

A Canadian in the U.S invented Basketball.

"Dr. Neismith, how do we get the ball out of the peach basket?"

by Don August 10, 2004

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canada history

Defined by Stephen Colbert of the Colbert report("Coal-bear Re-pore") as a sex act that uses Moose antlers (including the skull), maple syrup, and the stanley cup. This sexuall act is performed when two gay french canadians give eachother hot maple syrup enemas, and then release maple syrup covered fecalmater into the stanley cup. Soon after said gay french canadians battle to the death with moose antlers and reach arounds........the survivor gets a large serving of french fries and gravy for pleasing the canadian moose god (a.k.a. the maple moose)

1-"Man frank sure is walking funny".

2- "He must of had too much "canada history" last night"
1- "ahhhh so thats why his farts smell like maple syrup, and french fries with gravy".

by Red A. Massive February 5, 2010

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