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Nesquik Mondays

That unlucky day when your parents are going out and your uncle is "babysitting" you. But he actually chases you around the house until he is able to tear open your shitter canal and shove his gigantic monster throbbing, wet, veiny, motherfucking black monkey COCK inside of you and rip your ass crack in half and make sure you can't shit for 3 weeks! Nigga will turn your ass into a peeled orange pussy. Sometimes may shoot out your mouth from His 35 inch Fucken Nigga COCK! Make You Scream Pussy Nigga! The Final Result Is Nesquik..
Me: "NOOOO UNCLEEE!! PLEASE!! I HAVE BEEN THROUGH TOO MANY NESQUIK MONDAYS!!!"
Uncle: "LET ME TEAR DAT ASS OPEN LIL NIGGA!! GET OVER HERE!!!
by Cuntboiga March 19, 2019
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Monday Fucked

Coming from your weekend, you finish your day at work and afterwards you aren't just exhausted, you're in a delirious stupor and totally fucked.
Hey, are you okay? Looks like someone has a case of the Mondays!

Um, no. It's much worse than that. I'm Monday Fucked.
by Srslywtf December 11, 2014
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Wine Monday

The one official day of the week dedicated to drinking wine. After all, there is Tequila Tuesday, Weed Wednesday, Thirsty Thursday, Fucked up Friday, and Shit faced Saturday and Sunday. Monday needs love too! We all know that Monday is the one hated day of the week, so why not make it a fun day as well because we all know no one is raging on Monday (unless you alcoholics out there are being sneaky (;), so let's get casually fucked up. Plus, wine in moderation is good for you and can prevent heart diseases, Trader Joe's sells two buck chuck, and fancy wine glasses are seriously the best. NOMSSSSS
Bob: Aw fuck dude, it's Sunday I have work at eight tomorrow.
Joe: Is coooool, tomorrow's WINE MONDAY!
Bob: Woooooo can't wait to rageeeeeee after work doe
by sharkattacks December 29, 2013
mugGet the Wine Mondaymug.

muffin monday

When you find a muffin on the dashboard of your car on Monday morning but you have no idea who put it there so you post it on Facebook and find out your dad left it there for you.
by MuffinMonday412 December 5, 2016
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Compliment Monday

Every Monday people be nice to each other and give each other compliments as a way of being nice and to make each other’s Monday less awful.
Monday, August 6th (Compliment Monday)

Devin: Hey you have nice forehead

Aroura: Thanks you have a nice one too
by Clubpenguiner69 August 5, 2018
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Loose Monday

As you’re penetrating the ring that separates inner from outer from an angle that maximizes the gape of the vagina, prompting the inevitable “grrrrr Mondays” sentiment of the receiving party.
Dude 1: “Dude, Courtney could not walk this morning! You must have given her that loose monday!”
Dude 2: “Yeah, it was the loosest!”
by LooseMondays66 May 21, 2021
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Monday Zombie

A term to describe a person didn't sleep on sunday.
Phil: Hey Jim
Jim: Yeah Phil
Phil: Did you see Bob?
Jim: Yeah
Phil: whats up with him today?
Jim: oh he didn't sleep last night
Phil: Oh he's a Monday Zombie
by pervert king April 20, 2015
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