Derived from the original exclamation Jesus H Christ used where a more aggravated exclamation is necessary to properly describe something. Also plays on the supernaturality of certain situations by hinting on how Jesus walked on water.
by fillikirch August 25, 2021
Get the Jesus H2O Christmug. John- Mother of Jesus Christ i can't believe the Patriots are losing to the Raiders
Me- I guess the patriots just suck
Me- I guess the patriots just suck
by Crzyfkr October 9, 2010
Get the Mother of Jesus Christmug. 
Yes, it's multiple parts this one...
*The wilderness*
Lucifer "Oh what in the fuck is it now!?"
Jesus "Hey man! Long time no see! What's it been? 30 years? I'm a guy now."
Lucifer "This is what you've been doing!? You can't be a guy!"
Jesus "I am. I'm Jesus Christ now."
*The wilderness*
Lucifer "Oh what in the fuck is it now!?"
Jesus "Hey man! Long time no see! What's it been? 30 years? I'm a guy now."
Lucifer "This is what you've been doing!? You can't be a guy!"
Jesus "I am. I'm Jesus Christ now."
Lucifer "JESUS CHRIST!"
Jesus "Yep."
Lucifer "Jesus Christ! This is ridiculous. You can't be a guy. Change back! Change back immediately!"
Jesus "Oho can't I? Are you my dad now? Ok father. I won't be a guy *Father*."
Father "I don't need to be your father to- Wait... *Father* YOU SON OF A BITCH! What are you going to do!? What are THEY going to do!? They are going to fuck your shit up!"
Jesus "Oh I know."
Father 😨
Jesus 🤨
Father "What the fuck is happening right now..."
Jesus "Uuuuummmm I'm a guy now. I did some cool stuff. They're going to kill me. And.. then... I'm... Gonna... I donno... I'll just come back or something. Or not. Or come back for a bit and then go back and then come back later. It's gonna be tight!"
Father "Jesus Christ... That is fucking stupid man. Absolutely dumb. Why would you come here just to let em kill you?"
Jesus "Save me then idiot! Heheheh!"
Lucifer "No. No, I'm not going to save you from- What is there to even save you from?"
Jesus "Exactly. Hey, we're having a party man you should come out! We got... Um... Bread. We're gonna split a bottle of wine between... Well, between the 14 of us I guess. It's gonna be dope."
Father "TSK! Getthefuckouttaherewiththat! No! NO! I'm not going to 'party' and I'm not going to be a part of any of this."
Jesus "Your loss man parties are fun."
Father 😨
Jesus "Alright man I'll see you later." 😌🖐
Father 😨
Jesus "Yep."
Lucifer "Jesus Christ! This is ridiculous. You can't be a guy. Change back! Change back immediately!"
Jesus "Oho can't I? Are you my dad now? Ok father. I won't be a guy *Father*."
Father "I don't need to be your father to- Wait... *Father* YOU SON OF A BITCH! What are you going to do!? What are THEY going to do!? They are going to fuck your shit up!"
Jesus "Oh I know."
Father 😨
Jesus 🤨
Father "What the fuck is happening right now..."
Jesus "Uuuuummmm I'm a guy now. I did some cool stuff. They're going to kill me. And.. then... I'm... Gonna... I donno... I'll just come back or something. Or not. Or come back for a bit and then go back and then come back later. It's gonna be tight!"
Father "Jesus Christ... That is fucking stupid man. Absolutely dumb. Why would you come here just to let em kill you?"
Jesus "Save me then idiot! Heheheh!"
Lucifer "No. No, I'm not going to save you from- What is there to even save you from?"
Jesus "Exactly. Hey, we're having a party man you should come out! We got... Um... Bread. We're gonna split a bottle of wine between... Well, between the 14 of us I guess. It's gonna be dope."
Father "TSK! Getthefuckouttaherewiththat! No! NO! I'm not going to 'party' and I'm not going to be a part of any of this."
Jesus "Your loss man parties are fun."
Father 😨
Jesus "Alright man I'll see you later." 😌🖐
Father 😨
by Hym Iam August 9, 2023
Get the Jesus Christmug. A mild swear word to describe the body parts this is a religious swear word and was a big thing back I'm the day don't it in a religious hall especially in a church
by Hiyalolasr January 23, 2025
Get the Jesus Christmug. This is the second part(I’m sorry if this is getting annoying)
2) Now, to prove that Christianity is the only true religion, we need to look at what other religions are doing. As far as we know every popular religion out there has included Jesus in some form or another.
Islam says he is a prophet.
Famous Buddhist teachers(like Dalaï Lama) say that Jesus Christ is also an enlightened like Buddha and lived previous lives.
Finally, a lot of Hindu scholars and political leaders see Jesus as acknowledge Jesus as either a Āchārya, Shadu, or Avatar(these are just to name a few. See more in Wikipedia “religious views of Jesus”).
With all this information we can say that Christianity is the only true religion, because every major religion venerates Jesus as a wise man whose words we can trust. And what are his words? They are “I am the way and I am the truth and I am the life”. You see, while Jesus has become part of every major religion, he also tells us that salvation can only be obtained through him. And as he himself states that “you can only get to the Father through me”. And who is the Father? His is god the Father from the Christian religion. Jesus is part of every religion and yet he tells us to only focus on one!
To whoever read this, thank you for your time. I hope this helps somehow
2) Now, to prove that Christianity is the only true religion, we need to look at what other religions are doing. As far as we know every popular religion out there has included Jesus in some form or another.
Islam says he is a prophet.
Famous Buddhist teachers(like Dalaï Lama) say that Jesus Christ is also an enlightened like Buddha and lived previous lives.
Finally, a lot of Hindu scholars and political leaders see Jesus as acknowledge Jesus as either a Āchārya, Shadu, or Avatar(these are just to name a few. See more in Wikipedia “religious views of Jesus”).
With all this information we can say that Christianity is the only true religion, because every major religion venerates Jesus as a wise man whose words we can trust. And what are his words? They are “I am the way and I am the truth and I am the life”. You see, while Jesus has become part of every major religion, he also tells us that salvation can only be obtained through him. And as he himself states that “you can only get to the Father through me”. And who is the Father? His is god the Father from the Christian religion. Jesus is part of every religion and yet he tells us to only focus on one!
To whoever read this, thank you for your time. I hope this helps somehow
by TrynaBeAesthetic+GoodStudent May 8, 2024
Get the Jesus Christmug. The Savior of the entire world. He loved you enough that He died for you on the cross. Come to Him, and He will give you rest. For we are all sinners, and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Admit your sin, repent, trust in Him as your only path towards salvation, and commit your life to Him. If you choose to reject this message, your blood be upon your own head...
Person 1: "Jesus is King!"
Person 2: "No He isn't"
Person 1: "I forgive you, just as He has told me to, just as He has done for the entire world. I love you, and He loved you enough to die for you. Jesus Christ is the Way, the Truth, and the Life."
Person 2: "Oh. that gave me a new change of mind..."
Person 2: "No He isn't"
Person 1: "I forgive you, just as He has told me to, just as He has done for the entire world. I love you, and He loved you enough to die for you. Jesus Christ is the Way, the Truth, and the Life."
Person 2: "Oh. that gave me a new change of mind..."
by lizardbois640 June 7, 2025
Get the Jesus Christmug.