One of the world's oldest games, chess is classified as a board game, but is more like a mental sport, and is actually a massive example of the Dunning-Kruger effect. No matter how good you are at the game, you still suck, even the greatest players know they suck, and if you think you are good, you most DEFINITELY suck. All chess tournaments are competitions of who sucks least, everybody sucks to some degree, unless your name is Magnus Carlsen, and even he sucks next to a computer. It is believed (though not proven) that a perfectly-played game of chess will always end in a draw, and when someone wins, it is always because the other person fucked up.
Most people, due to pop-cultural osmosis, know the basic rules of chess, but know nothing about how to actually play the game. This frequently results in people who have a modicum of skill thinking they are "good at chess" because they've only ever played "regular" people, then when they try playing against actual chess players, they're in for a rude awakening.
If you get into chess as an adult, you will discover that 8-year-olds regularly whup your ass forwards, backwards, and sideways at the game every single time, but at least you can go home knowing that you have had sex, and they have not (though, this is also questionable if you are a chess player).
Despite the growing popularity of chess since COVID, and recent attempts to reach out to women, any given night at a chess club is almost guaranteed to be a sausage party.
Most people, due to pop-cultural osmosis, know the basic rules of chess, but know nothing about how to actually play the game. This frequently results in people who have a modicum of skill thinking they are "good at chess" because they've only ever played "regular" people, then when they try playing against actual chess players, they're in for a rude awakening.
If you get into chess as an adult, you will discover that 8-year-olds regularly whup your ass forwards, backwards, and sideways at the game every single time, but at least you can go home knowing that you have had sex, and they have not (though, this is also questionable if you are a chess player).
Despite the growing popularity of chess since COVID, and recent attempts to reach out to women, any given night at a chess club is almost guaranteed to be a sausage party.
I play chess because I hate myself.
by q359 July 24, 2023
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Get the chess vegans mug.A chess-punch is a strategic move between two people who are battling for control / power over a situation or others. Where the attacker uses a combination of mind-games and plausible truths to out-strategize their opponent in a grab for power, to such a great extent that it disables their component and prevents them from making any further moves. In doing so - it can create great mental anguish in the mind of the person being attacked and can lead to mental illness.
Kareem was a workplace psychopath who placed great emphasis on the power that he had over situations and others. He had a background spreading democracy throughout old Russia, crazy stories that inferred past involvement with the intelligence community, a deep understanding of how to read others and knew how to use sub-text to alter the perceptions that others had of him, themselves and the situations that they were involved in. He was a scary guy.
Dave - who was new to the business - got off on the wrong foot with Kareem. Kareem was worried that Dave was trying to disempower him. Kareem used manipulative tactics to instil fear in Dave's mind and to out-strategize him - ultimately culminating in a chess-punch that disabled Dave and prevented him from being able to function.
Dave - who was new to the business - got off on the wrong foot with Kareem. Kareem was worried that Dave was trying to disempower him. Kareem used manipulative tactics to instil fear in Dave's mind and to out-strategize him - ultimately culminating in a chess-punch that disabled Dave and prevented him from being able to function.
by dave342314 October 10, 2019
Get the chess-punch mug.A phenomenon in chess where a player makes moves that align with what they would like their opponent to do instead of playing the objectively best move. The most common result is that their opponent does not play the moves they "want," resulting in confusion and, ultimately, major blunders.
by Ubeenbamboozledson December 13, 2024
Get the Hope Chess mug.A psychological game where one or more people deliberately feed matching lies, half-truths, or “scripts” to control how another person sees reality — like chess pieces being moved on a board.
“He described the situation as gaslighting chess, where multiple parties mirrored lies to corner him emotionally and psychologically.”
by anonymous September 8, 2025
Get the Gaslighting Chess mug.When somebody says something is chess not checkers, they're implying that it is somehow more serious, or to be taken more seriously than checkers if it's chess, even though they are both games. Not everything in life is a board game, so the worst kind of game is one that seems designed to be taken seriously when games are the opposite of serious.
by The Original Agahnim September 22, 2021
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