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sift monkey

1. One who's social skills are evenly compared to those of an autistic savant. sans savant.
2. One who's athletic prowess and general coordination resemble a one-armed, one-legged man trying to compete in an "ass kicking while jump roping" contest.

'sift monkey' usually refers to one who constantly employs both of the above qualities throughout his day-to-day interactions. He appears like a monkey that is very inept in his ability to find gold while sifting through the river.
That sift monkey in high school who was caught in the locker room jacking off, while huffing the girl's gym teacher's granny panties.
by Nutty Goodness September 24, 2005
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SIFT

Save It For Therapy
When someone, "the sharer", gets drunk and shares overly-personal information with an innocent bystander, "the sharee".

Usually the sharer is too much of a dumb ass to notice:
1) They are not nor ever will be besties with the sharee(s)
2) The sharee(s) isn't/aren't drunk enough to handle said information without their heads exploding
3) The sharee is not their therapist, so the sharee is not getting paid enough to react calmly to said information

Any of these conditions could lead the sharee to exclaim SIFT!
Friend 1: I went to a party with that heinous girl from work last night. I simply ran out of excuses.
Friend 2: What happened?
Friend 1: She downed 3 shots of tequila while I was in the pee-room. I came back and she told me about how her dog can find her g spot. She asked me if that was normal.
Friend 2: EWWWWWW
Friend 1: Yeah, it gets worse... I tried to change the subject by asking her what she wants for her birthday
Friend 2: And????
Friend 1: She wanted to graduate from her dog to a donkey. I should have told her to SIFT that sh*t is gross!
by Regenstein August 3, 2009
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Related Words
sif sift Sife Sifat sifting sifty sifu siff sifter sifa

sifus

The leetest guy around the waix scene. He has all the new data, and everyone should look up and show respect to him otherwise he will not share his data.
Man, that sifus, he is the leetest guy! He fxped to me the latest game! I love sifus!
by Psycho December 16, 2003
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Sifa

A gang know in South Central LA and In Some Parts Of Oakland.
In San Pedro And Wilmington Is Were SIFA Can Be Seen Also In LongBeach
by Codyz January 8, 2008
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SIFF

Beccaboo is a SIFF.

That girl is a SIFF.
by AllieMae July 17, 2007
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siffy

having to do with White Castle, cheap, extremely skinny, many kids, oppositte of his father
a hick who does not like sharing, father eats in extreme amounts and has many quadrouple by pases per year, ALBINO
by Pete November 14, 2003
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sifted

Another word for pissed off, rattled or just angry
man hes sifted or man im sifted cuse i faild my test
by -dil December 18, 2008
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