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too good to be free

Just like da "too good to be true" situation, this term refers to some wonderful item/service dat you will supposedly receive for nothing, but which you should seriously wonder if that is actually "all there is to it", or if there is some hidden proviso involved.
Da Bible claims dat you will receive happiness and riches beyond belief if you "just believe", but it sounds to me just like a "too good to be free" deal. God makes you endure a life of excessive toil and misery and abstinence first, so what good is that??
by QuacksO March 10, 2021
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Free Ballen

Slicing your own testicles and filling the cavity with Tide Pods (or any other object or substance).
“Ey bru, you free ballen tonight?”
Slicing n Dicin’ my brutha. Straight clean like Tide, Son”
by MisAnthroPissed September 22, 2023
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Free

Bored of the opposite person in your relationship. Want someone else instead because got bored of your girlfriend. To break up.
Jake told his girlfriend he wanted to just be free and not have to deal with her, later she found out he went straight to another girl.
by Maddiison November 24, 2018
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Free Tibet

Term used by Westerners that doesn’t really work because Tibet was heavily invested in by the CCP and their previous government used to be a theocracy, and Tibet hasn’t protested since 2015.
Westerner: Free Tibet!
Actual Tibetan: I really don’t care if we get independence
by SomeRandomUrbDicBruv June 15, 2022
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Free Candy

Giving away candy for free. Mostly given by people in white van cars.
Hey kid do you want some free candy, just come to my van over here.
by orange_FAYGO December 27, 2022
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Getting off Scott-free

When you bone numerous raw dog sloots but manage to not get an std
Ginger bar wench: "did you see who Regan fucked last night? I'm surprised he didn't get aids"

Crippled rugby player: "he really got off Scott-free"
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Getting off scott-free
by Wiley j October 1, 2017
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Spotify free

I HATE SPOTIFY IT IS MAKING ME LOOSE MY MIND.
I'm actually going insane it's not a joke. For those of you with Spotify premium you will never understand our pain... never mind the CONSTANT ads-literally every 5 minutes- Spotify doesn't think my discernment is good enough tor picking one song. No spotify has 5 more recommended songs to play in front of my desired song. It feels classist I can't explain why it just does... and now Spotify is taking away our lyric reading rights! It feels like an injustice. And dear Spotify, due to how bad you have treated me I will never EVER cave. You will not have my money. You have broken my trust.
Switching to pirating music ❤️ (joking for legal reasons)
Me and my loved ones at a funeral~ "sweetie you are in charge of the playlist after all this was your best friend, they would want you to do the honors..put some Spotify on"
"really are you sure...?"
"Yes love put together a playlist please."
*A curated 5 hour sad music playlist playing*

Ave Maria finishes playing** Spotify thinks she got it from here and puts on bad feeling (oompa loompa)
(sped up vers.)
"This is so disrespectful!!!!, I can't believe you would play this at your best friends funeral!!"
*all loved ones shun you*

'In the car'
Let me put on some music!- *you will get 30 minutes of uninterrupted listening after this short break* (lies) "tampax can protect just like pads!!!😁😁😁😁🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
Friend later* Marsai Martin isn't real she can't hurt you, i'll put on some calming music...
"Marsai
Martin here!! ok true story! One time while vacationing in the Bahamas-
“AHHHH SKIP IT PLEASE SKIP”
"I can't Spotify free froze the screen!!"
"You ran out of skips!!!!"
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