touch the mustard

-General whorish behaviour

This behaviour leaves the same, difficult to remove stains that coming into contact with mustard can have.

Not to be confused with cut the cheese, which is much more innocent.

1. Concerned friend: "I really wish that you wouldn't touch the mustard so often"
Whore: "It pays the bills"

2. Guy: "Damn, I can't get these mustard stains out"

by this name isn't actually real December 19, 2010

The Trojan Mustache

When a man is denied sex by a woman in the morning after waking up, when she goes back to sleep, you lay a used condom over her upper lip and leave.

Bob: That slut Jenny wouldn't do me when we woke up so I gave that bitch the trojan mustache.

Tom: Damn straight, bitch had it comin'!

by rarussell93 July 25, 2011

Ride the mustache

A seemingly innocuous app-driven cab ride from a private vehicle emblazoned with a large pink mustache on the grille, sometimes involving minor parked detours allowing passengers, generally female, to sit astride the driver, generally handsome and customer service-oriented, for some quicky cunnilingous.

I was meeting my man at a bar downtown and caught a ride in one of those cabs with the pink mustache. The driver was so fun, I asked, shyly, if I could ride the mustache.

I smiled all through dinner.

by Word finder January 2, 2014

san francisco mustache

When a guy gives another guy a cum mustache on his face.

Hey Ben, imma give you a San Francisco Mustache tonight.

by TheUrbanVerbose January 26, 2017

Man milk mustache

Wen a man ejaculates semen on the upper lip of his partner.

Lady night Cindy choked on my Johnson so good I had to give her a man milk mustache..

by AZ in the city May 4, 2017

The Devil's Mustards

A severe case of diarrhea, when the feces carry the same characteristicas as various types of mustard. Usually yellowish brown in color and runny in consistency, sometimes looking a bit grainy in appearance.

I ate some bad fish and have had The Devil's Mustards all morning.

by maskedrolla December 31, 2017

Spilling the mustard everywhere

"When you comment on something even though no one fucking asked after your opinion but you wanna annoy the shit out of people anyway"

"Why is Alina always spilling the mustard everywhere?"
"I don't know, maybe she want's attention"

by UninportantNichname December 11, 2017