Speeding Ticket

(NOUN): A summons issued to a coworker or employee when they screw up a task because of task saturation. Or a summons your spouse issues to you for screwing something up even though you are managing a thousand things correctly.

e.g., 1) My boss keeps giving me more sh*t to do just so he can give me a speeding ticket for messing up a task. 2) My wife is always giving me speeding tickets when I screw up and when I give her a speeding ticket, she always figures out how to turn it around and issue the speeding ticket back at me.

by Barely Managing February 13, 2023

ticket taker

Someone who sells their freedom, morals, independence, soul, etc. in exchange for material wealth and worldly pleasures. (In other words, a sellout of the worst degree.) These people are typically lapdogs of the dark overlords that run the media and entertainment industry.

Ben Shapiro is often hailed as a prodigy, but he’s really just another ticket taker. He sold himself to the media industry and now he’s a spineless cuck who only does what (((they))) tell him to.

by EliteNinja26 July 29, 2023

Timber ticket

A rag, pillowcase or blanket used to mop up semen.

Mom found the timber ticket

by Muthaphukker January 19, 2022

Golden Ticket

Magnum condom

I make girls feel special because they get the golden ticket.

by Hamilto86 August 26, 2016

Hooker tickets

Another term for American one dollar bills.

I paid for my lunch using hooker tickets.

by Roscoethadon May 24, 2018

Rippin' Tickets

A phrase used to describe something that is facinating, attractive, or just straight up amazing. Hence the term, "Rippin' tickets."

Dude, that breakdance is rippin' tickets.

by Flauphlin December 1, 2010

Floating a Ticket

Floating a ticket is a scam often employed by servers in restaurants. It is usually accomplished by ringing in one generic ticket (e.g. a water and salad bar) and handing the same check to multiple persons. This is of course impossible to use with credit cards as an authorization is required. Obviously, floating a ticket constitutes theft and could result in prosecution. So don't do it.

Server 1: I've got to pay my rent in three days and I'm a buck fifty behind.
Server 2: Float a couple of salad bars. That shouldn't be a problem.
Server 1: Isn't floating a ticket illegal?
Server 2: Only if you get caught.

by Mr. Woodford June 1, 2009