Not to jack my self off

Similar to “not to toot my own horn”, it’s said before someone is going to talk about what makes them great.

Not to jack my self off but I do have the nicest ‘69 mustang.

by Unk22 August 05, 2022

jacking the dog off to feed the cat

Having bad times financially. Not having any money, being broke.

I have been so broke, I had to start jacking the dog off to feed the cat!

by Neil White October 30, 2006

Jack me off like you beat your own meat!

"Jack me off like you beat your own meat!}" is what I tell my {roomie to do to me sometimes.

Hey Matt, Jack me off like you beat your own meat!

by eda-skip November 25, 2021

jacking off a trans man

you expect to take a man with a 9 inch dick home instead you bring home a tranny.

Example: Last night I was caught by my mother jacking off a trans man!

by TheLaughingJackass April 08, 2024

Jack-Off Scratchpot

An experience referred to as "The opposite of winning a Scratch-Off Jackpot" by both members of the llama breeding field and the Japanese, a "Jack-Off Scratchpot" is an interrogation technique in which several armed guards ejaculate into a bowl of Lucky Charms, and the victim is given the option of volunteering information, or being forced to eat the cereal, along with its horrifying broth/sauce.

"Upon arriving at the North Korean prison, Drew found himself being the unfortunate winner of a Jack-Off Scratchpot, after refusing to relinquish information on the US Nuclear program."

by KickDickem April 21, 2017

jacking off

MASTURBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOONNNN, for guys

i like ''jacking off''

by fapping January 03, 2017

Jacking off

Something my old teacher said when he meant messing around

Teacher:"quit jacking off Charlie and get a book out"

by cape hatrack September 11, 2022