grooming excuse

Any use of a feeble, or implausible excuse used by someone to escape from a conversation on a mind-numbing, or uninteresting topic for the listener. Refers to someone explaining their preference to 'wash their hair', 'do their nails' or some other such excuse, which would be an otherwise less desirable chore than having to suffer through listening to such a boring conversation.

These excuses were popular in sit-coms, where the lead actor wanted to extract laughter from the audience with the punchline illustrating the implausibility of the excuse being believed by the recipient.

Claire: When I came back with your wine you'd already left. What happened?

Steve: When that wine-snob came over to talk about the wine we were drinking, I had to use a grooming excuse to get out of there.

by WineBusProf February 21, 2015

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Excusion

The act of using confusion as an excuse to not perform work.

Often used on backshift in Naval shipyards

"Hey, did Bob get that job done last night?"
"No, he was confused by step 1.0 in the procedure so he didn't get started."
"Bob always using the excusion technique to sit on his ass all night" *shaking head

by Dizzzy2020 September 06, 2020

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Excusions

An excuse disguised as a solution

It seems today all we get is deception, lies, lip service and excusions from our elected officials.

by MixedUp January 24, 2022

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excuses are like asses

Indicates the prevelance or abundance of a thing. Adds a negative connotation to what every you are comparing to assholes. Usually used as "blanks" are like asshole, everyone's got one.

Mustangs are like assholes, every one has one.

by tex May 24, 2004

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