cotton monkey

A small piece of cotton from your boxer shorts that becomes tangled in your sweaty arse hairs and swings around like a monkey in the jungle. Usually found after sport or other strenuous activities. The cheeky buggers often interfere with arse wiping after ones shit.

Thommo had found some mean cotton monkeys when he wiped his arse.

by Tom Purcell April 27, 2005

Contour

A word used to greet or insult a fellow brother. A guy who says stupid shit.

Your a contour man.
That was a contourish move.
Bradley Woo.

by Bradley Woo May 6, 2008

Kissing cotton

When you have go number 2 so bad that the turd is actually poking out of your anus.

Dude, your going to have to pull over at this gas station. I've got to crap so bad that I'm kissing cotton.

by Southbeachstyle September 25, 2008

contoocook

the village in the town of hopkinton NH named by native americans. also a word no masshole can pronounce.

masshole: where do you live?
wicked awesome NH resident: contoocook
masshole: haha what was that co-ton-a-cook?

wicked awesome NH resident: *blank stare. proceeds to run over with a moose. stands over masshole and says 'ya bitch ya!'

by JQ of c-ville July 6, 2009

Colton Fuck'd It

a phrase used when something is broken or out of order.

The desk is broken, i bet colton fuck'd it.

by lmao26 December 16, 2010

cotton eyed joe

when a man is tested for an std and has a q-tip inserted into his urethra his joe is now cotton eyed

If it wasn't for that dirty slut I would never have experienced a cotton eyed joe!

by not of your goddam business November 18, 2009

cotton master

1. someone who owns cotton pickers.
2. someone who owns someone at something (i.e. a videogame, etc.).

1. during the civil war there were a lot of cotton masters.
2. while playing halo 2, cotton masta sean owned cotton picka allister. or cotton master: "don't you have cotton to be picking?"

by halo 2 cotton masta May 28, 2006