spanking the monkey

waxing the carrot, choking the bishop, jacking the beanstock, yankee-ing the doodle,peting the one eyed wonder weasel, waxing the wood, caulking the cracks, jacking off, wanking.

"Oh dear jebus, jimmy is spanking the monkey in class!!!"

by bhrome April 6, 2004

spanking stick

a red sexual object, that resembles a devils triton, has a tendancy to spank peoples backsides, when they are least expecting. Is uncontrolable, will feel uncontrolable pleasure if this happens to you.

woman walks down street, drops keys, bends over, and THE SPANKING STICK strikes at full Pelt.

by CG October 28, 2003

Spanking the moonface

Another slang for masturbating, pleasuring ones self or fingering.
May be used in conjunction with beating the pufferfish.

Person A: What are you doing?
Person B: Beating the pufferfish.
Person A: What the actual....?
Person B: You know, spanking the moonface.
Person A: Ah.... I'll leave you to it then.

by Tbell November 9, 2014

spanning

The fine art/act of stalking, scrutinizing and mentally/physically tormenting a person as if they were your girlfriend or boyfriend. This is usually because the person who is doing the spanning is arrogant, a pompous windbag or they feel like they are owed. They have feelings for the person they span and have decided that person belongs to them without the consent, permission, reciprocation of same feelings or even the knowledge of the victim they span. The art/act of spanning is often conducted in front of friends or others in an effort to embarrass and belittle the person they span into acting the way they desire.

Person 1: Did you change the locks to lock me out of my own house??!

Person 2: Where tne fuck were you? Who did you leave with?

Person 1: None of your business, quit spanning me!

by poonanni May 3, 2016

spanking the monkey

Taking things in to your own hand or a hand trusted by you.

I woke up last night and found my monkey standing up. I spanked him and he went back to sleep.

by David October 27, 2003

spandling

when you let your dogs out and wear sandles while wearing a studious piece of denim(pants)
sandles+pants=spandle

what the fuck bro the teacher is spandling rn

by candle+paperpack January 30, 2023

Spanking

It is the perfect punishment for everyone alike when they detract from the path of righteousness. The individual being punished undresses in front of the punisher exposing his/her genitals in a humiliating way, so they remember this next time they do same mistake, after which their bums get sound beating either with open hands or implements. Everytime the male or female sits, they will remember to not repeat the offence.

Lover 1: If you'd been given a spanking as a child, you wouldn't have been this characterless brat you are. Never too late, from today I'll personally make sure your bum understands that. With your buttocks and genitals exposed, you might start remembering you are an adult honey!!

Lover 2: Oh honey, I am so sorry. This will not happen again please forgive me!!!

Lover 1: Grace time is over, take off your clothes!!! Else I'll spank you harder!!!

by speakingjustfactz September 25, 2023