Glasgow is a complicated city in Scotland defined by extreme highs and lows. For example, its extremely high citizens (especially in areas like Castlemilk (also known as Chateau Lait by the cultured) and Govan) and its extremely low IQs. To be fair, this definition could apply to the rest of Scotland as well. Known as Glaswegians or Weegies by the rest of the country and held in particularly high regard, its people scrape an existence in call centres, pound shops and in the wholesale distribution of sugar, alcohol and saturated fat to the population.
Epitomised by 'football' teams Celtic and Rangers who slug it out each year to be crowned Champion of the most meaningless competition since the "World Series" of Baseball kicked off in 1903, Glasgow has few real attractions.
Rare highlights include getting mugged on one of the city's many dangerous walks home, avoiding sex offenders in its train station toilets and running the gauntlet of Big Issue sellers and Chuggers on any street where at least one cigarette shop/charging cash machine/drug dealer still operates.
Epitomised by 'football' teams Celtic and Rangers who slug it out each year to be crowned Champion of the most meaningless competition since the "World Series" of Baseball kicked off in 1903, Glasgow has few real attractions.
Rare highlights include getting mugged on one of the city's many dangerous walks home, avoiding sex offenders in its train station toilets and running the gauntlet of Big Issue sellers and Chuggers on any street where at least one cigarette shop/charging cash machine/drug dealer still operates.
An Edinburgh joke about Glasgow:
Q. How do you make a ouija board (pronounced weegiebored)?
A. Steal his Buckfast and hide his Jellies.
Q. How do you make a ouija board (pronounced weegiebored)?
A. Steal his Buckfast and hide his Jellies.
by Genghis Khant March 24, 2010
Get the Glasgowmug. by Ploppp May 2, 2010
Get the Glasgowmug. "look at that glasgow over there!"
by Suductriss April 16, 2009
Get the Glasgowmug. A headbutt
by Hshdbfhfnfbbfby February 2, 2019
Get the Glasgow kissmug. A headbutt. Within Glasgow itself the term 'Gorbals kiss' is often used, referring to the most dangerous area of Glasgow. It is hypothesised that within Gorbals it is known as a Crown Street kiss; and on Crown Street it is called a Number 73 kiss; and at Number 73 it is known as Steve's kiss. Steve, however, calls it whatever the fuck he wants to.
Love ain't like the movies
it blisters and bruises
and knocks you about with its fists
It Leaves you a wreckage
all postaged and packaged
and sealed with a Glasgow kiss
- Sealed With A Glasgow Kiss, Carter USM.
it blisters and bruises
and knocks you about with its fists
It Leaves you a wreckage
all postaged and packaged
and sealed with a Glasgow kiss
- Sealed With A Glasgow Kiss, Carter USM.
by J. Z. Knuckles September 1, 2008
Get the glasgow kissmug. by Why o why March 29, 2021
Get the glasgow 69mug. Two quick bursts of deodorant under each armpit. As favoured by men who are in too much of a hurry to use a H2O equivalent.
Hamish I will be with you in a second, I'm just gonna put a t-shirt over my overalls and have a quick Glasgow shower.
by Drdonelittle November 25, 2009
Get the Glasgow Showermug.