Calculator

My brain, my every ounce of being human

Guy 1: Have you seen my brain?

Guy 2: what? you lost your brain?

Guy 1: yeah, it is green and had buttons on it, oh yeah it say "Texas Instruments" on the front.

Guy 2: dude, that's a calculator

Guy 1: I DON'T CARE JUST FIND IT

by Who The Douce Are You? April 12, 2005

Calculator

Straight up Jonathan Cooper

You really got a 36 on your ACT? You're such a fucking calculator

by theurbanpoet69 April 25, 2020

Calculator

Malware dev's most admired system program to test whether their remote access trojan works

*plays multiplayer game* zOmG!! teh calculator have just opened by itself!11

🧐🤪🤪🤪

by ­­ June 18, 2021

Calculator

Cheating device for those to lazy to work out 2+2.

Idiot 1: Dude, what's 2+2?

Idiot 2: Dunno. Steal Jane's calculator.

by Tyler Christie February 18, 2009

calculating

acting in a scheming and ruthlessly determined way

he was a coolly calculating, ruthless man

by lucky Jasmine September 1, 2017

Calculator

Code word for phone

Brooke: *phone falls out of pocket in class*

Aiden: “You dropped your calculator.”

Brooke: “Yea, thanks.”

Teacher: “What did you drop?”

Brooke: “My calculator.”

Teacher: “Ok. Get back to work.”

by brookemt057 March 27, 2019

Calculated

Acts intentionally to achieve something

Anyone who turns on their location for everyone when they are plotting is calculated (and a loser).

because they want others to see what they’re doing

by JC47 September 26, 2023