tortucan

somebody who's cognitive architecture is dominated by the ability to selectively NOT think about things they don't want to think about: brings up subjects they don't work through, don't work through details of something they think happened, not paying attention to most of the data.

When the creationists were presented data and scientific proof that the earth is 4.5 billion years old, they kept their tortucan attitude and didn't bother to study it.

by Retsejretsej July 14, 2019

Dry Tortugas

A U.S. national park in the Gulf of Mexico. Also known to a group of unfortunate few, the act of dry heaving out of your ass. This usually happens after a long episode of watery diarrhea. Your ass opens, goes through all the motions, your sphincter may even prolapse a little, but nothing at all comes out! And if you listen closely, you may even hear your butt hole open and shut as is fails to discharge any fecal matter.

JACOB:Hey Mike I'm gonna stop and grab a burrito bowl on my way into work. You want me to grab you something too?
MIKE: No way dude. Last time I ate one, I am pretty sure the guacamole was bad. I had the "Dry Tortugas" all night!

by CharlesUFarley June 7, 2018

tortugan

coined by James Downard, The term "tortugan" describes someone who holds so keen to an idea that they arent even willing to actually discuss it, protecting their mind like a tortoise (spanish: tortuga) protects itself with its shell.

Creationists are so tortugan, arguing with them is like trying to smell the color of 9.

by chrischi3 October 14, 2017

Tortuna

It means love and blargendoodle. This is also a word you should use when you are angry or surprised. This word was also used by the one and only Cravon Morgan.

"Oh my tortuna,"Maria said.
"I tortuna you,"I said to Mark.

by crayoncolor1305 September 13, 2018

tortugueando

When someone has to poop so bad that it the turd starts popping out and the suppressions makes the turd go back in. Mimicking a turtle’s head popping in and out of its shell.

I need to find a restroom ASAP, I’m tortugueando.

by Ct-0025 July 24, 2022