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telemarketer

The telephone equivalent of spam.

The worst kind of salesman in the universe.

Traits: Officious, sometimes bullshittingly "polite" pricks who will recall your number over and over when they aren't scamming other random phone numbers.

How to deal with them: Shoot em up! ...er, i meant

How to really deal with them: Whenever one of these calls you, immediately i.d. which category it falls into:

Survey
Unwanted service
Donation scam
Subcription for 40 months of shitty magazines you dont need

Now the fun part. Keep acting like youre interested in whatever theyre offering. Thank them for every last excruciating detail they throw at you at hyper-machine gun speed so they have trouble concentrating trying to sucker you into their shit. Prolong everything. Ask questions about everything they say (be sure to sound as happy as can be, and as interested as a masochist in hell). Then, when the inevitable closing deal part of the conversation comes, your choices are:

Hang-up
"Fuck youz" + Hang-up
"Go fuck yourself"
"Get a real job"
"U r SuxOr"
"-random soundeffect-"
"i did your mom"

Be creative. Let your imagination take over in getting back at these asses. Peace`=)
Notorious telemarketers = Orange County Register, Phone survey groups, Magazine subscribers

All mentioned above, kiss my ass
by Ranger Elite July 21, 2008
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telemark

1. A style of skiing (mainly practiced by hippies) that involves half a binding, half a brain, and a whole lot of balls. Well suited for powder and backcountry access.

2. a place in Norway
I’m a pot smokin’, tree hugin’, telemarkin’ hippie
Telemark: drop knees not bombs
by beerman January 23, 2006
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Related Words

telemabob

One of those dang blasted mobilized devices that every Tom, Richard, and their dog Harry carry around with them day-to-day.
I done went down to Ralcomm and got me one of them there telemabobs.

Sorry I got to go my telemabob is ringing.
by Mooty with the big booty December 12, 2018
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telemarketer

a human being trying actually pay their bills just like the rest of you except they probably hate their jobs as telemarkets more than you hate them.
"i feel like i have no soul because i am a talented telemarketer. i need a beer."
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telemarketer hunting season

A hunting season that should exist.
by 1ns4n1ty April 27, 2006
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telemarketer

A person who sits on the phones and badgers the hell out of people to either donate to the police or sign up for a credit card. Yet, the telemarketer gets a huge kick out of people who cuss and scream at them and ask to be taken off the list.
Anybody who works for Millenium Teleservices/CDG Management, LLC RULE!
by Glenn Pasch September 19, 2003
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Telemarketing

Something where people who dropped out of high school can go and make money by making unwanted calls to people over the phone.
Telemarketing is the stupidest thing ever invented in the history of telephones.
by Scottish_Emperor843 December 23, 2018
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