I couldn't give a monkeys fuck if he had two left feet
by rubyredpoppy November 06, 2015
A sexual position where the human with the dick(the monkey fucker) stands on two feet bent over the woman's backside, entering her from behind.
WARNING: this position has a tendancy to create a loud clapping sound. "CLAP CLAP I AM THE MONKEY FUCKER"
WARNING: this position has a tendancy to create a loud clapping sound. "CLAP CLAP I AM THE MONKEY FUCKER"
Bangbros.com- Assparade, download the movie "Ride 'em Cowgirl"
Then fast forward to 33m 55s. The MONKEY FUCKER is in the upper right hand corner of the screen.
ENJOY!
Then fast forward to 33m 55s. The MONKEY FUCKER is in the upper right hand corner of the screen.
ENJOY!
by MATT MATT THE BUTT PUNISHER February 06, 2007
Shortened version of the backstage expression "That looked like a monkey fucking a football" -- i.e. "Oh, wow, that was so godawful awkward and stupid that I had to stare at it." Among stage crew and roadies, a monkey fuck is not just any mistake or accident. It's something that you couldn't possibly avoid that forces you to look really stupid in front of a large audience.
"I hear load-in took a while."
"Oh, shit, they got us carts but they were two inches too wide for the passageway, and they only gave us half a crew because we had carts, and the band just got these new super expensive amps, so we had to hand carry them and not bump or drop them, and then the loading dock door jammed so we were carrying them through the front lobby, four house guys on an amp, all bent over like hunchbacks, with a roadie following us and screaming to be careful, and everyone in line buying tickets laughing at us. It was a total monkey fuck."
"Oh, shit, they got us carts but they were two inches too wide for the passageway, and they only gave us half a crew because we had carts, and the band just got these new super expensive amps, so we had to hand carry them and not bump or drop them, and then the loading dock door jammed so we were carrying them through the front lobby, four house guys on an amp, all bent over like hunchbacks, with a roadie following us and screaming to be careful, and everyone in line buying tickets laughing at us. It was a total monkey fuck."
by old lang guy February 19, 2008
by jon March 30, 2003
The act by which a man penetrates and trusts into their partner while holding them. The penetrated partner is not in contact with the ground but may be leaned up against a wall
by crapshooter111 January 13, 2007
A person who thinks they can fix something, usually on a car, better or faster than you. The keep running their mouth and getting in your way until you let them try to do the job. When they fuck it up, they get mad and say " Well if you don't want my help, you can do it yourself" then they leave.
It took me twice as long to change the struts on my car because Monkey Fuck had to help, then he bailed out on me with all the parts scattered all over the garage.
by Colt357dog April 26, 2015
Can happen at almost anytime, but is best when the fuckee is bending over, I.E. to tie shoe, ect. The monkey Fucker will jump on the fuckees back and either ride or teabag the fuckee. It can be done girl to girl or guy to guy or girl to guy or guy to girl without being homo or lezzy at all.
1 "Dude, Jose was tieing his shoe and Joe jumped on his back and started teabagging him!"
2 "Yah, Jose totally got monkey fucked!"
2 "Yah, Jose totally got monkey fucked!"
by bruddah-C January 08, 2010