friendzone

Friendzone:

The friendzone is a terrifying place for young men, as it resides deep in Satan's ass crack. When a young man attempts a romantic/sexual relationship with a woman and is rejected due to her disinterest, he dramatically exclaims that he is in the friendzone. The woman insists that they are 'just friends' but the young man cannot comprehend, as the dating pool has always looked like an arcade to him, and women the machines that you insert kindness coins until sex or a relationship falls out.

Then the man blames the woman for his inability to land a date/girlfriend/someone to cradle his balls. 3 magical symbols appear, to guide him into the friendzone. First, his fedora descends from the heavens, embellished with naked ponies. Then, it starts raining Monster drink, and the man is soaked in the presence of excessive sugar and whining. Finally, he emits a warning call (most likely by trolling on Reddit) and finally the friendzone swallows him.

We are not sure what happens in the friendzone itself, but the faint echoes of "I'm a nice guy" can be heard all the way from the ass crack of Satan. It's truly a terrifying place, where one can lament about other women's shortcomings and call them "bitches, sluts and whores" when the whining just won't cut it.

Woman: "I think we should be friends."
Dudebro: "OMG I CANNO T BELIEVE THIS. I PAID FOR YOUR SHITTY ASS DINNER. I TREATED U LIKE A HUMAN BEING. H OW CAN Y OU DO THIS, HOW?"

Woman: "I'm just not interested in you."

Dudebro: "IM MELTING IM ME LTING U FRIENDZONING BITCH. THE FRIENDZONE IS IN SATAN'S ASS CRACK. THAT'S SO GAAAAYYY."

by bronybasher69 June 3, 2014

Friendzoned

When someone of the opposite sex does not find you appealing enough to be in a relationship, so they instead prefer to be "just friends". This is called the friendzone, probably because you're too good to be not friends, but not good enough to be in a relationship. You're in that "zone". Getting friendzoned is the act of getting rejected for a date by the person you felt love for, and for them to then suggest a general friendship. You shouldn't use the word seriously, it makes you sound needy. Use it as a joke.

Person 1: I've known Britney for awhile, im going to go ask her out.

Person 2: well then, prepare to get friendzoned!

by Anal confetti December 13, 2016

The Friendzone

(Noun) This is a metaphorical hell for men. It is typically initiated by a guy asking out a girl and her saying "Oh, I only see you as a friend.".
One common example of this is girls will reject a nice guy, and date douche-bags, all while complaining to the nice guy and saying things like "Why can't all guys be like you?".
Again, this is only a stereotype.

It is possible to escape the friendzone, but it is not easy. It is a long and difficult road.

Poor George, he was put in the friendzone by that girl he really liked.

by 88888888888888888 October 10, 2013

friendzoned

When a member of the opposite sex (usually one you want to hook up with) declares you to be "just a friend", thereby ruining all potential chances of sex.

Noj: Dude, I met this really hot chick and I was gonna hook up with her...until I got friendzoned!

Eiddam: Aw damn man! that sucks ass!

by whiteknownpirate April 26, 2009

Friendzone with benefits

An amazing, enhanced version of that awful thing we refer to as the friendzone. The friendzone with benefits is when someone and their best friend (hopefully of the opposite gender) have benefits such as cuddling, making out, oral pleasure, and even sex. Possibly the greatest alternative to dating in the history of history.

Mark: "hey are you gonna date Katie or what?"

Josh: "HAHAHA I'm not an idiot. We're in the friendzone with benefits!"

Mark: "you clever basturd, josh."

by MarshallTruck January 28, 2014

Friendzone Asshole Syndrome

A very serious condition that can alter the mood of someone who is single and a virgin, typically causing them to ditch their friend group for a girl that does not want them. Someone diagnosed with this syndrome is typically an asshole to their friend group of guys, because there's a lot of misplaced anger.

Symptoms include, but are not limited to:

—ignoring friends
—creating awkward silences
—getting pissed over minuscule problems
—not wanting to be around anyone else, except the girl they like
—the girl they like is NOT interested in them, therefore they feel bad. See friendzone.
—this becomes a cycle where the diagnosed take out their emotions on their friend group even though the friend group is totally innocent
—clearly violating the concept of Bros before hoes

There has been no developed cure, however symptoms seem to be alleviated when the guy and the girl become distant, since the relationship becomes nothing and the guy comes to terms with it.

Stay away from Landon, boys. He's developing some serious symptoms of Friendzone Asshole Syndrome.

by HowDoYouDoFellowKids September 27, 2017

gay friendzoned

When you're gay and you really like some guy (and you're not sure of his sexual orientation) and you end up being BFFs. You take the leap of faith and tell him and you get completely dumped. Worse than the friendzone because you don't just have zero chance, you have negative chance.

Person:
Man, you hook up with that ambiguous-orientation boy you like yet?

Other Person:
Naw, I got gay friendzoned. I really thought he would be into me, we were such good friends.

{true story}

by wolfboy180 May 19, 2014