Battering the Fish

This is a sexual deviancy action which is composed of three steps. While having sex with a woman "doggy-style" you use your left index finger to "fish-hook" the woman's mouth. Second, once you have your "fish" on the line, use your right hand to punch her in the face with the intention of knocking her unconscious. Although it is ideal to cause unconsciousness with one strike, you may repeat if necessary. The final step requires a third party to be present. At this juncture, it is imperative to have a picture of your "trophy fish" to brag to your friends as they may not believe that you snagged such a lunker. In the final step continue to use your index finger to hold her up by the mouth (you may use your other hand to help alleviate the strain of holding up dead weight with your index finger by grappling the back of her neck or hair--just make sure it isn't visible in the picture) and have your friend snap a shot for posterity.

Ted: Golly! I am very excited to hang out with this lovely woman I met at the Creed concert last night! We shared a strawberry margarita together!

Harvey: That's fantastic! I will be over at 9PM sharp! I will have the camera ready after you finish Battering the Fish! We can dispose of the corpse in the morning!

by The Big Cheez August 26, 2013

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