coitus 

a type of cheese that goes good with ham sandwiches

i'll take some coitus on my sammich!

coitus by bobthebuilderofchina January 20, 2011

Coitus 

Fancy way of saying sex

I want someone you **** me then say I had coitus

Coitus by Jacob black December 20, 2020

coitus 

Word that was being yelled in my house recently because my dumbass friend learned it in a health class and wanted to freak out my parents.

"Hey Dawn, COITUS!!!! COITUS, COITUS!!!"

coitus by Pookie February 22, 2005

Coitus 

When you get fucked by a large inverted dragon cock with a mutant plant growing through it.

Example 1: I committed coitus last night
Example 2: would like to have coitus baby boo hunny bun?

Coitus by InsanityUB March 30, 2017

coitus 

just playin about the dumbass thing, i meant to say my really awesome friend yelled her newly-aquired word at my mom:) you know i love ya lacenut

l:coitus!
m:shhh!!
l:COITUS!!! COITUS!!
m:SSHHHH!!

coitus by Lacresha February 23, 2005

coitus

A bland, clinical, and objective word for sexual intercourse; Oten used by the TV show character, Sheldon from Big Bang Theory

"I just wasn't sure of the protocol now that you and Leonard are no longer having coitus."

coitus by ANONY-CHAN April 20, 2026

Coitus Procrastination

The act of thinking about football, soccer, golf, dead puppies, your mom etc etc during sexual intercourse causing a disruption in your exitement level and thus, not cumming as fast as you normally would (i.e. 1 minute)

Joe- I was about to cum while having sex with my girlfriend, but i had to resort to coitus procrastination since it had only been 45 seconds since penetration.

Mark- Awesome bro! I will start coitus procrastinating from now on!!

Pablo- Que? No el inglishh

Coitus Procrastination by MrPollo2010 February 23, 2010