raped by a cactus

When something is so frustrating this is usually said as a response.

"This game is so difficult! It's like being raped by a cactus!"

by hailthemotherland September 22, 2013

Baby Cactus

A woman's pubic area when it has been shaved and left for 4 days or more.

Arthur: "Why are you being such a douche?"

Matt: "My girlfriend is mad at me, and now she has a baby cactus going on!"

by GrosBilodeau March 4, 2011

cactus ass

When you have several hairs in your bum, and you also don't wipe. The hairs began to crust, and become more firm so it pokes around your bum.

Omg Becky, I totally have cactus ass.

by Firekrackerinmybutt September 5, 2017

Cactus Bitch

Meaning: Someone who is very annoying

Oh my god... you are such a Cactus Bitch! Just leave me alone already!

by felixhasrabies March 26, 2011

Happy Cactus

noun/verb.
plural form: Happy Cacti

When a guy who has participated in "No Shave November" goes down on a girl to eat her out. The rubbing of the stubble against her vagina would be analogous to a cactus rubbing against her flesh. In an added twist, the female has a deflated balloon inserted in her vagina. As the balloon is blown up by the male partner's mouth play, the balloon expands, causing a tickling sensation.

In a male-to-male variation, substitute the vagina for an anus.

Hunter made his girlfriend scream in pain and delight as he gifted the Happy Cactus upon her.

Mitchell's boyfriend made him scream out in pain and unexpected delight as Mitchell was surprise Happy Cactus'ed.

by CPT Morgan, Ph.D. December 2, 2010

Cactus Punch

The act of shaving your nether regions too far in advance of engaging in sexual intercourse; this results in a 5 o'clock shadow causing the sexual partner to feel as if they are being punched in the genitals by a cactus.

I shaved my junk on Wednesday and then hooked up with a chick on Friday. I totally cactus punched her.

by donthejon October 28, 2011

Cactus kiss

When two straight dudes rub their face hair stubble against one another. Only works with a small amount of stubble, not suitable for beards.

Hey man! Long time no see. Let's cactus kiss and let me get you a beer.

by CaptCamarillo November 22, 2010