Turtle poaching

When you punch someone who has a small penis in the dick making there head shrivel like a turtle.

Payton: i got turtle poached by some guy yesterday
thomas: omg is yo dick okay i hate turtle poaching

by Arnold mcjagger June 3, 2013

Mud Turtle

When you are having anal sex and you get feces on penis.

I was doing her doggy style and pulled out and she gave me a mud turtle.

by mudturtleking December 9, 2019

Turtle Strategy

When your hooking up with a girl and you don’t relax when you kiss and go too hard 😈

Example: Nikita Fishman does the turtle strategy too much!

by stacy moiseyeva June 5, 2020

squishy turtle

a girls vag

Guy 1:yo dude did you get that squishy turtle yet?
Guy 2:no man i didnt its some bull!
Guy 3:wait you guys dont mean a real turtle do you?
Guys 1 and 2:hahahahahaha

by JackReacher XMP July 5, 2010

Turtle Pizza

When you stick your dick in a pizza and feed it to a turtle.

Man, did you see Jeff do a Turtle Pizza last night!

by Sassy Steve July 13, 2022

Psychedelic Turtle

A deviant sex act where a man is receiving a blow job and also has a turd about to drop, cumming and shitting at the same time.

Jeff was blown away by the psychedelic turtle that Jane gave him

by DeviantSex July 18, 2019

Texas Turtles

Another name for bed bugs.

Don’t you know that hotel is prime territory of Texas Turtles?

by Vladimir Ilich Ulyanov May 23, 2018