five step process

Step One: flatter and sweet talk
Step Two: pretend you're husband material
Step Three: send shirtless pic
Step Four: talk about the future
Step Five: send dick pic

This process never fails in getting girls.

Justin Choi executed the five step process flawlessly.

by jchoi1001 October 1, 2017

porcelain tug

(v.) masturbation while sitting on the toilet.

The shower is running and you are taking a piss. You suddenly realize that you need to take care of business before you get in the shower. You quickly perform the "porcelain tug."

by Kyle Vade October 22, 2006

emergency repair procedure #1

When a piece of equipment malfunctions, the proper response is to kick it as soon as possible in the hope that it rectifies the problem.
How expensive the equipment is and the time it would take a technician to arrive, however short, are irrelevant.
It is usually only succeeds in worsening the problem, however, most techs appreciate the user trying at least some form of repair themselves. Hence, the rule.

McCoy: Chalmers, the transmitter is down again.
Chalmers: What were you doing?
McCoy: Trying to make a call.
Chalmers: Then what did you do?
McCoy: Emergency repair procedure #1
Chalmers: You kicked it?
McCoy: Yep.
Chalmers: Well, at least you tried something.

by Scale Enlie March 5, 2008

Porcelain Sauna

When your poop rises above the water and causes your genitals to warm up.

Josh: Taco Bell is the shit, but I hate how cold they keep their bathrooms.

Jesse: Don't worry, after eating Taco Bell, you'll get a nice Porcelain Sauna.

by JesseIU July 13, 2010

Steering the porcelain bus

Drunk and spewing while holding the rim of the toilet to stop falling in.

Hary's pissed, he's off steering the porcelain bus.

by Richard Kopf November 29, 2007

Self-Propelled Mobile Sperm Receptacle

Any woman who serves but one purpose in life....that being to gain favor with men by being known for one thing and one thing only.

A polite name for a women of very loose morals.

Also, a women who gets around, literally.

The best thing that you can say about her is that she's a self-propelled mobile sperm receptacle.

by Coolidge Whore Driver June 10, 2010

Porcelain Goddess

(n) Toilet;lavatory. Derived from it's common porcelian material and everyday importance.

Uh guys...I need to pay golden tribute to the porcelian goddess.

by The Amazing Anonymous One July 10, 2004