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Schrödinger's Can

A beverage can that has been open for days and may or may not have a bug in it. You can't see into the can to get a clear answer, therefore the can simultaneously does and doesn't have a bug in it until you pour out the whole thing and see for yourself.
"I wouldn't drink that, man. It's been out for a while. It's a real Schrödinger's can at this point."
by BoredCollegeKid April 6, 2016
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Schrodinger's Handjob

When you tittyfuck a girl who has a flat chest so its not really a "handjob" but its also not really a "Tittyfuck"
man 1 - "Bro i just got a great tittyfuck from my girlfriend"

man 2 - "bro your gf is super flat are you sure it wasn't just a Schrodinger's Handjob"
by Beastman723 April 7, 2017
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schrödinghim

a guy who could be gay or straight... but, you put him in a box... 👩 🔬💁, and you won't know until you open it and turn on the lights!
Jim's sexuality was a mystery. That schrödinghim was always floating from guy to girl: we couldn't tell he was gay till we caught him under the bleachers with Tom!
by KifoFox May 7, 2017
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Schroedinger’s Communication Syndrome (SCS)

The nagging need to keep checking your email/text messages, while waiting for a reply… Until you look, there both is/is not a message waiting.
I really need that reply from the doctor; I don't think he's replied yet, but until I look, I get to have Schroedinger’s Communication Syndrome (SCS)
by thehypermom July 3, 2017
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shredding the cat

To shred the cat is slang for masterbation. For example ‘cat’ is the penis and ‘shredding’ is the act of moving ones hand up and down the shaft.
Much like schrodinger‘s cat, it’s an allegory of life.
Marek was is in his room shredding the cat so loud his house mates became concerned.
And his penis became sore.
by Loweena November 1, 2017
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Schrodinger's Kim

When North Korea's Leader has been assumed to be dead but there is no information to confirm or deny the claim.
Person 1: "Did you hear that Kim Jong Un might be dead?"
Person 2: "Yea but he's Schrodinger's Kim until anything is said about it"
by weswes887 April 28, 2020
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Schrodinger's Irony

When someone says something that is of controversial nature, then decides whether it was irony or not based on the other people's responses.
Guy 1: "I fucking hate everyone"
Guy 2: "That's not very nice..."
Guy 1: "Chill, it's just a joke ok?"
Guy 2: "Yeah sure, that's just Schrodinger's Irony"
by AlcoholVolcano June 27, 2020
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