We all remember that day when we learned what cancer was, but my parents in particular did excruciatingly well telling me that half of my mom's side of the family had cancer and that they were going to eventually die. In fact, I think she first told us(me and my brother), at the ripe age of 4 and 2, that our grandma had stage 3 breast cancer and was going to die. She didn't even tell us what cancer was, for fuck's sake. And the consequence of that was me going on for another 8 years thinking cancer was instant death and that different parts of your body could get it.... Like, what the fuck? And then turns out my Grandpa had prostate cancer, so that was fun, but not as lethal. Another one of my great-uncles had ball cancer AND lung cancer. I can only pray that I don't share any of their fates, but I think one of the reasons she escaped it was because she went to med school. Definitely not me, so I can only hope.
Mother: Son, your grandma is going to die.
Son, crying: What?! Why??
Mother, in a perfectly calm face like this happens to her all the time: Cancer.
Son, noticing her lack of caring: Fuck you. Goodnight forever.
results of when your parents explain to you what cancer is
Son, crying: What?! Why??
Mother, in a perfectly calm face like this happens to her all the time: Cancer.
Son, noticing her lack of caring: Fuck you. Goodnight forever.
results of when your parents explain to you what cancer is
by PORGSSSS October 17, 2023
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Toby has a child from a previous relationship. Toby starts seeing a woman called Emily who also has a child from a failed relationship. Both are unable to commit to anything serious, but enjoy the casual nature of their relationship. To keep things going, they agree to be Parents with Benefits. Their separate children can play together and later the adults get their own play time. However Emily finds someone else, and her situation changes. Seeing that her and Toby can't continue, they end the Parents with Benefits, but remain friends still. Their children still play together.
by SA_Slang June 14, 2015
Get the Parents with Benefits mug.arrogant narcissistic assholes that deserve to trip over on their faces and say their daughter will go to hell when in reality they will be going there instead for being the devil in disguise
by subuuuuuu!! December 23, 2021
Get the Adris parents mug.The annoying people in your life that annoy the living crap out of you and force you to do things you don't want to do. Then they have the NERVE to stand back and say ''why does my kid rebel so much?''. MAYBE if they'd let us have some FREEDOM we wouldn't rebel so much, and the more we rebel during our teenage years, we grow up to be crazy drug addicts who go out and have the fun we weren't allowed to have when we were kids.
Thanks parents for making us hate our lives.
Thanks parents for making us hate our lives.
''Parents are annoying as hell''.
by thegirlnextdoor23 September 6, 2011
Get the Parents mug.The type of parents whose kids will eventually cut ties with them permanently and never meet them again, or do elderly abuse. What goes around comes around.
Person 1: Heard John and his parents don't talk to each other anymore. What happened?
Person 2: His conservative parents drove him nuts. So when graduation came around, he disowned them permanently.
Person 2: His conservative parents drove him nuts. So when graduation came around, he disowned them permanently.
by senthurmanz May 28, 2018
Get the conservative parents mug.Parents who practice the liberal religion of Unitarian Universalism. They are usually amazingly tolerant, and open to letting their kids explore whatever they want (i.e. their bodies, hallucinogens, alcohol, other kids' bodies, ETC.) Unitarian moms and dads are incredible cooks, and they always use organic ingredients they picked at the local farm. They're often (but not always) of higher income, and 99.9% of them vote Democrat simply because they're far too smart to do otherwise. Their kids grow up to be well-rounded and successful, and many of them go to work for the Diplomatic Corps. The best thing about Unitarian Universalist parents is that they love their kids no matter what. They don't give a cosmic f**k if their son or daughter grows up and finds a new religion, discovers he or she is gay, or elopes with a dirty, shoeless hippie. They'll just give them a hug and invite them (and the shoeless hippie spouse) over for a gourmet tofu steak and some imported beer.
Unitarian teenager: Bye, Mom and Mom! I'm going to a 4/20 party!
Unitarian mom: Have a good time, honey. Remember to bring some condoms.
Other Unitarian mom: Call us if you think you'll be home by tomorrow!
One year later...
Unitarian teenager: Mom and Mom! I was accepted to Harvard!
Unitarian mom: That's fantastic, honey. I knew all those years of Mandarin Chinese, French, Tagalog, Russian, Arabic, Portuguese, Afrikaans, and conversational Greek lessons would pay off!
Other Unitarian mom: Let's go on a spirit journey in the Sahara Desert to celebrate!
As you can see, Unitarian Universalist Parents are the only parents who know how to live.
Unitarian mom: Have a good time, honey. Remember to bring some condoms.
Other Unitarian mom: Call us if you think you'll be home by tomorrow!
One year later...
Unitarian teenager: Mom and Mom! I was accepted to Harvard!
Unitarian mom: That's fantastic, honey. I knew all those years of Mandarin Chinese, French, Tagalog, Russian, Arabic, Portuguese, Afrikaans, and conversational Greek lessons would pay off!
Other Unitarian mom: Let's go on a spirit journey in the Sahara Desert to celebrate!
As you can see, Unitarian Universalist Parents are the only parents who know how to live.
by I See Dead People August 27, 2013
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