Knowledge Management

Knowledge Management (KM) is a discipline of management supposedly dedicated to ensuring that people in an organisation have timely access to the information and expertise they need to do their job. In reality, KM is a discipline full of semi-literate twats who like to use big words. They say things like "We're going to strategically align our knowledge resources with the company-wide strategy going forwards","We're moving into the client space", "I'm mostly working on the growth pillar to add value", and "Going forwards, we're working on a P2P strategy to add value and capture tacit knowledge." In English, all of this roughly translates into one sentence "I'm a giant wanker who produces no meaningful work and talks a load of shite. Senior managers love me because I sound good to other people who only have a fourth grade reading level and are impressed by big words".

KM adds nothing useful to any organisation, except where they have managed to take over research and subscription services or database management. In which cases, the managers take all credit for the work done by their lowly minions, thus further convincing senior management that they "add value", when the reality is quite the opposite. Any cost-cutting exercise in any large organisation should start by savagely slashing the senior KM people - let the minions report to each other and you'll probably get a lot more done anyway.

I tried to find some information but it had been knowledge managed

by ex-KM-minion April 6, 2005

branch manager

A term that refers to african americans who supervise monkies in trees.

Branch Manager: "OHHH OOHHH AAHHH AAHH!!"

by svtcobraman October 28, 2006

managerie

An herbal bath.

Guys, I have to go. It's time for my managerie.

by Shaft August 6, 2003

Chatroulette Manager

Sometimes it's just too difficult to devote all of one's attention to Chatroulette.

Therefore, a friend or other lame individual will launch Chatroulette, focus the webcam on his group of bros, and keep pressing "Next" through the amalgam of dicks, until he finally comes across a female. This "Manager" will then alert his bros immediately.

Chatroulette Manager: "Guys I got one! Oh shit, it just turned into a little fat kid."

Avi: "Any luck, Chatroulette Manager?"
Manager: "Nope, we're at 50:1 Man to Woman ratios."

by halpwr March 23, 2010

marrage

Female forces male into it.
Also known as the last legal form of slavery.

Guy: "hey want to go the that new strip club?"
Guy with marrage: "I can't my wife needs me to go shopping with her"

by DanieyD May 5, 2008

business management

a shit boring subject, which at the best of times lets you go on the computer, where no good websites work.

"och shite! business management next lads. everyone remember their pillows today?"

by qwerty20581-34755757834857 December 25, 2006

Wiki-management

Wiki-management is a term coined in 2006 by Net Literacy that describes its collaborative and synergistic manner of creative and evolving management strategies and tactics through the input of hundreds of Netizens' contribtuions. The term "wiki-management" will become commonplace in the years to come - and it is how Net savvy organizations will continiously reinvent themselves to focus on an unchanging mission in a changing world.

Wiki-management is the creative synergy of Net savvy management coupled with the wiki concept of collaboration.

by Urban Net Definitions June 7, 2009