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Designated Drunk

The designated drunk helps to occupy the police while his buddies drive away.
A cop was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible DUI violations. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. The man sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes.
Meanwhile, all the other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started his engine and began to pull away. The cop was waiting for him. As soon as he pulled onto the street, the cop stopped him, read him his rights and administered the breathalyzer test to determine his blood-alcohol content.

The results showed a reading of 0.0.
The puzzled cop demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, "Tonight I'm the designated drunk."
by Crawdadz January 1, 2009
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intelligent design

Advocated by the Christian right, a "scientific" theory proposing that the gaps in the darwinian theory of evolution can only be explained by the existance of a supreme being, and thus should be taught in public schools.

complete bullshit.
"The school board voted on intelligent design."
by Hannahhh January 9, 2006
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Related Words

Desi

Desi is a special girl who won my heart over after ive been heartbroken n torn apart SEVERAL times. Desi is the girl you can rely on in ANY situation, she'll never leave you hanging and always love you at the end of the day. Desi is one in a million.
That girl aint as good as Desi, thas my WIFE.
by GEBGEBXDESI4ETERNITY August 12, 2021
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designer

chic, sophisticate, luxury, classy, elegant, beautiful, name brand, rich, suave, enriched, quality, high end, expensive.
I am wearing a designer hand bag. It looks so expensive.
by GalleriaofArtCOM March 20, 2014
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designer water

A commercial brand of mineral water, often served or sold under pretentious circumstances or marketing and/or at exorbitant cost.
I went to the cocktail bar with the guys, but as I was drivin' I had to sip designer water all evening.
by Lior Bar-On January 9, 2006
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desi revolution

desi parties and get togethers are helping to keep desi flava alive and lead to desi revolution
by Aashish Dhand December 11, 2008
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designerrhea

The output of designers who are really fast but produce shit designs.
John just spewed out some more designerrhea for us to work on for the new web site.
by The Real Killjoy April 21, 2010
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