Hoboken Squat Cobbler

When a fully clothed person sits in a pie (or other cake like pastry) and commences to weep like a little girl. Squat Cobblering is usually engaged in by ugly, bald, middle aged men, who usually have some form of what appears to be mild autism. Said mild autism may manifest itself in an childlike, irrational and downright creepy obsession with baseball cards.

Did you see the back of his pants? He either crapped'em, or Hoboken Squat Cobbler'd a chocolate cake.

by Bob Barr 123 August 28, 2016

squat cobbler

A man who sits in a pie and wiggles around for sexual arousal.

"I bet that Randy is a Squat Cobbler "

by Whoretism August 29, 2016

doorstep cobbler

A worthless talentless individual, bereft of taste and style; most probably hanging out for a crack at the younget member of the household.

I shouldnt go near them, they look like a doorstep cobbler.

by peter james woods July 20, 2009

squat cobbler

Fetish. A squat cobbler is a person who sits in pie in order to sexually arouse a partner. Often, a squat cobbler will wear a costume and/or cry while performing the fetish. See also: Full Moon Pie, Boston Crème Splat.

Roger enjoyed treating his partner with increasingly elaborate squat cobbler performances, but unfortunately his dwindling budget for premium pies and laundry fees put a damper on the fun.

by w. munny August 20, 2016

Squat Cobbler

Noun. - One who sits on a pie, occasionally while crying or in a costume. Type of fetish porn

God damn that squat cobbler video turned me on

by Zerker161 September 3, 2016

Cobbler

A sexual advancement where feet are used as fists.

Please don't give me the cobbler

by Cobblerboy May 27, 2018

squat cobbler

An "art" that involves the act of squatting in a pie, rubbing your ass cheeks in it and recording it as a fetish video . Mentioned in AMC's Better Call Saul.

Jimmy: "He was making squat cobbler videos for a wealthy gentleman."

by straight_busta August 31, 2016